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Air out your dirty laundry?


Soapsuds

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Funny the same thing has happened to me. I wasn't always heavy but freshmen year of college I pretty much topped 200 pounds but by the time I graduated I had turned things around to get down to 150 where I have pretty much remained ever since. I went from a size 38 to a 28. Aside from a few bulimic episodes, most of the weight I lost was indeed natural due to my cutting out sodas and heavy exercising. My still in the closet ex-boyfriend was big into running and swimming so I took it up with him. As a matter of fact I swear after I quit drinking soda pop I lost 20 pounds overnight. The bulimia came afterward, a psychological response to the weight loss I suppose. It was a great fear of mine I would get fat again and also the feelings of "hey, why not lose more since you lost so much?" It was a horrific problem, because I go several days of eating possibly only 1200-1500 calories a day til that awful day would come where I'd eat a good 2500+ calories. I'd feel sick, fatty, my stomach would become extremely bloated and disproportionately distended that my only comfort could come through vomiting it back up.

Oh the part of my still in the closet ex-boyfriend? The lying jerk he is still the closet about being bi. He actually use to be my best friend when I moved into the college dorms but not after after I came out as gay we made out, and thus began a whirlwind of drama....

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My cousin, Karen, who almost became my adopted sister, is really BIG into genealogy. She has traced our ancestry back to 140 AD. She tells me that we're related to Princess Margaret of Tudor (Henry VIII's sister) who married James, King of Scotland.

When I was a pre-teen, I attempted to get into genealogy, but what I uncovered was most unsettling.

I would often ask my grandmother (my maternal grandmother) the date that she married my step-grandfather. Logic would dictate the following: I knew the dates of birth of all my aunts and uncle; those that were born when my grandmother was married to my grandfather, and those from my step-grandfather. There is a two-and-one-half year difference between my youngest full aunt to that of my oldest half aunt.

All my grandmother would say was 'November 1.'

Aunt Louise was my youngest full aunt.

Aunt Marcia was my oldest half aunt.

So, I then had the possible marriage date narrowed down to either Nov. 1, 1930__ or Nov. 1, 19_31_. If it were the latter, that would have meant that my grandmother was three months pregnant with Aunt Marcia when she married Dominick.

I found out the name of the church. I called, and got the most shocking bit of information...my grandmother married Dominick on Nov. 1, 1940. 14 months after my grandfather died at the age of 47.

That meant that the children my grandmother had by Dominick were all born out of wedlock. My youngest half aunt was Born in 1937.

My grandmother and step-grandfather lost an infant son, Joseph, at the age of 1 year old. He was born sometime between 1932 and 1936.

I went into the County archives, and found out that my grandmother and step-grandfather's divorce was granted in September of 1936, just about a month or so before my grandmother got pregnant with my youngest half aunt. So, that meant that my grandmother had THREE pregnancies (Marcia, Joey and Virginia) by Dominick while she was still legally married to my grandfather.

Yikes! You can imagine how I felt when I found this out. My family was not too pleased when I found out this bit of information.

As I told you, my mom was very, very close to my grandfather. My grandmother had had several miscarriages prior to my mother's birth. My mom weighed only 1 pound, 12 ounces at birth. She and her twin brother, were 2 1/2 months premature. Unfortunately, the boy lived only a few hours. So, my grandfather used to call my mom as the 'first one who stayed.'

If all my grandmother's pregnancies/children had lived, she would have had 9 children by my grandfather and 4 by my step-grandfather, in a span from 1923 - 1937.

Apparently, my grandfather lived for a while with my grandmother and Dominick and all the children. Pretty unconventional family dynamic, wouldn't you say?

My grandfather was a very fair, blonde German, while Dominick was a very dark Italian. The youngest kids mistakenly told their teachers at school that they had "two daddies at home, one white and one colored (black). Double YIKES!Back in the 1980s, Paul Reiser had a TV situation comedy entitled 'My Two Dads.' The premise was that these two bachelors, each of whom had had a relationship with a woman, had to help raise a pre-teen daughter of this woman after her death. Neither was sure which was the biological father, therefore, the title 'My Two Dads.'The premise was that these two bachelors, each of whom had had a relationship with a woman, had to help raise a pre-teen daughter of this woman after her death. Neither was sure which was the biological father, therefore, the title 'My Two Dads.'

At the time my grandparents' divorce became final, my mom, then age 12 going on 13, chose to live with her dad. This infuriated my grandmother. My mom idolized her father, and vice versa.

In September, 1939, just about a week or ten days after Germany invaded Poland, starting World War II, my grandfather died at the age of 47, from meningitis.

I'll leave you in suspense -- in typical cliffhanging style, and will continue this fascinating look into my 'dysfunctional family.'

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This is an interesting thread. I've got some stories from both sides of my family that seem too crazy to believe, but they are all true, I assure you.

My father has bragged about committing theft in his younger days. When I was visiting him and he was talking with he's cousins, he told a story how he and some friends cleaned out a convenience store so he could get money to get a hair process.

My great aunt ripped my father and his siblings off for a portion of my grandmother's estate, it wasn't anything huge, but nonetheless it was a good deal of money. My father held that grudge for years, but he's finally forgiven her.

Have a cousin on the paternal side that was arrested for selling drugs in a nightclub, another one who treated a guy who was nice to her very badly and after he moved on with another woman, she set his truck on fire. There was another cousin of my father who ran a drug house that was busted.

On my mother's side, I have an aunt that practically stalked her workers compensation attorney because she was convinced he was interested in her. She'd call him at home at night and make him food. He finally dropped her case because of all the nonsense. In the past, she did have an affair with a married judge, who went on to preside over Michael Jackson's trial.

That same aunt was once so angry at my mother for helping her daughter (my cousin) find a job (she's very possessive of her daughter and abusive) that she phoned CPS and tried to get me taken away from my mother. She pulled the same CPS stunt with her daughter, because she didn't like the man that her daughter married. My mother and grandmother practically raised her daughter and was closer to them than she was my aunt and she's always resented that.

Other incidents from my aunt included, teaming up with my great-aunt and badgering my grandmother about wearing pants to church, throwing my other aunt (her sister) out in the street while she was pregnant. Beating my uncle with a broom when he wouldn't sign over a check to her. It goes on and on.

One of my great aunt's daughters slept with her cousin and had a baby.

Have a cousin that was arrested for indecent exposure, he got in with the wrong crowd and they somehow ended up taking his clothes and he ended up with nothing on out in public.

As for my dirty laundry, fortunately I haven't been caught up in much, but I have a minor little story. When I was about ten, I saw someone on television flip the bird and I had no clue what it meant, so I decided to try it out by flipping the bird to some construction workers who working just outside my window. Needless to say, one of the workers mouthing "you stop that" sure taught me that it was not a good thing.

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And, now for the continuing drama of 'My Dysfunctional Family'...

I found out that my good natured and kind grandfather actually paid for Joey's funeral. The local obituary, which I found in the Historical Society Museum, incorrectly identifies Joey as 'Joseph G___' rather than 'Joseph I____.'

Apparently, my grandmother and Dominick wanted to keep their relationship as secret as possible.

In 1941. my mom graduated from High School, and for the next 7 years, worked at a bank. She earned $13 a week. She would hand over practically her whole weekly pay to my grandmother to help support her younger siblings. All she kept for herself was the bus fare money to and from work. My mom would have to walk about 3 miles into town just to catch the bus, as they lived in the rural outskirts of town.

When the war broke out, Dominick went into the army. In Europe, his job was to serve as the stretcher carrier where he remove the wounded soldiers off the battlefield and into the nearest Army hospital.

My mom had, practically, nothing for herself. The mother of a distant cousin of hers would even have to sew and hand make my mom's undergarments. You might say that she was the Cinderella, doing for the rest of her family, and neglecting her own needs.

Then, the unthinkable happened, seven years later, my mom got engaged to my dad. That meant that my grandmother's major source of income would be lost. My mom was 24 when she got married, and my dad was 19 days away from turning 30 at the time of their marriage.

A really sad story, isn't it.

My grandmother would often cry to me, and voice her regret for having married Dominick. She realized, too late, that she should have stayed with my grandfather, who idolized her, and did everything for her.

It's funny, even as a baby, I could tell that Dominick was not my 'real' grandfather. He would throw me up in the air, which I am told, hated. When the other grandchildren visit, my step-grandfather would hand out quarters, etc... to my cousins, but not to me, as I was only a 'step' to him.

Of my 18 maternal cousins, 9 were 'G' cousins, and 9 were 'I' cousins. My oldest cousin, Frank, is dead. He was the one who had a messed up life, due to his parents splitting up. During his stint in Vietnam, he got involved with drugs and was in and out of trouble with the law, serving jail time, and eventually ending up in a Veteran's Administration Hospital, where he died when he was 63 or 64. At one point, he was briefly married to a black girl, Olive (if memory serves me correctly). I never met her. She lives in the Midwest.

My step-grandfather, as I told you, would peak into the window and watch my mom and her sisters get dressed and undressed. Once, in my presence, he made a pass at my cousin, Jocelyn (a 'G' cousin).

My mom was nothing like her 'G' siblings. My mother did not go out, all over town, hooking up with dates. I know for a fact that my grandmother would take my two aunts to bars, for the express purpose of hooking them upwith a guy. She knew enough not to do this with my mother, because she was never like her sisters. My mother, with a very clear conscience, wore white at her wedding to my dad. She was a virgin, which is more than I can say about my aunts and uncle.

I will always believe that my aunts and uncle were jealous of my mom because she was the only decent one.

My Uncle Ernie served in the Korean War and after his discharge, needed to borrow money. My mom co-signed a loan for him at the bank she worked at. You guessed it, he defaulted on his loan and almost cost my mom her job at the bank.

When Uncle Ernie's wife's sister got married, he had the colossal nerve to bring his then girlfriend to the wedding reception. You can imagine what a humiliating experience that was for my Aunt Madelyn.

My aunts Jennifer and Lucy were the ones I told you about who tossed three of their four children, by their first marriages, to the wayside, in preference to their second husbands. It's bad enough to have one aunt who did this, but, two is simply disgusting, if you ask me. I don't know how they ever lived with themselves, knowing what they did to their children.

Frank's life was ruined. Karen was shuffled between her father and his subsequent wives and her paternal grandmother.

Now, he plot thickens even more. Karen was brought up, thinking that my Uncle Donald was her biological father, but did not learn the truth until she, herself, was married and had a child of her own, at the age of 21. Her biological father was the father of one of Karen's classmates in school. Karen, however, always thought of Donald as her father, and vice versa. Donald was my father's second cousin, as I told you. My Aunt Lucy died in 2006. Donald died a couple years ago.

Karen was the one who had to introduce herself as her sister Georgia's 'cousin' at Georgia's wedding reception in 1969. I was just two weeks away from turning 13, at the time. I knew the truth, and was dumb-founded when I saw the adults carry out this charade. They did this as to not to have the new in-laws become curious and start asking questions.

This is just the tip of the iceberg of my family's history. You hear the phrase 'dysfunctional family,' boy, was that a suitable way to describe them.

When I was 4 years old, my father wanted us to move to Arizona. We were all packed and ready to go. We stopped to say 'Good-Bye' to my grandmother and aunts, who started with their crocodile tears, saying that they'd 'never be able to see Little Billy.' My mother changed her mind, which was the biggest mistake she ever made.

To be continued...Quite an interesting soap opera? Sadly, it is all true.

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I don't think my laundry is as dirty as others but here goes:

I recently asked my friend for a huge favor - one that would involve possible jail time if caught, however it was a necessity. I would not have asked him if it wasn't of the utmost importance and since he's a gangsta he's immune to the law. With my back against the wall I felt compelled to ask him since we've been best friend for years and truly been we've there for each other. When I asked him he said he would on one condition - I would have to sleep with him. Needless to say, I was stunned. I thought I didn't hear him correctly but very casually and deliberately he repeated the terms of his condition. I considered it not only emotional blackmail but rape because he knew that I did not want to sleep with him. Very seriously he told me consider it a trade because he needs to get something out of it. He revealed he has always wanted to have sex with me and now it's the perfect opportunity because he knows I cannot refuse. Also, it's payback. Payback for the time we weren't on speaking terms and he wants to teach me a lesson. His revelation has thoroughly flawed me and now I'm wondering if people I thought were friends can truly be this evil.

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I recently found out that my former near 50 year old MARRIED boss is sleeping with his 23 year old secretary. Im surprised she would do that but Im not surprise about him as he has a history of this. I feel bad for his wife bc she was in the office a few months ago to visit him and no doubt saw and talked to the woman that's f--ing her husband and didnt even know it. I have so much dirt on this guy its not even funny. It feels so weird bc I literally have the power to destroy him and this goes beyond just meaningless affairs. I mean on a financial, professional, emotional and personal level. I could make him lose his company, his career, his reputation, wife, family, freedom and its all bc he got greedy, sloppy and has a big ego. Luckily we are not enemies bc if we were sh-t would go down.

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While at my grandfather's very WASP funeral in the late 1990s his sister (my great aunt and my grandmother's nemesis) arrives in a knee length mink coat, huge Alexis Carrington hair, deeply tanned skin and Jackie O style sunglasses with slingbacks clip-clopping down the church aisle. She was 73 at the time. Anyway, as his coffin is being lowered into the ground she leans across the opening in the ground and loudly mouths to my brother and I, "Darlings! We'll see you at the beach house next month, right?!"

When my family and I got into the limo, my grandmother, who was a mix of Michelle Phillips and Tippi Hedren, stared at all of us and exclaimed "That c**t stole my moment!"

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