Alrighty folks, let's get this Best & Worst of the Housewives 2023 party started!
As usual, some of the specifics of the first half of the year are blurry, so the more current shows are fresh in my mind. I'm sure I'll add and subtract as we go along Also to note for my own list: I do not watch Miami or Dubai. My advance apologies if I went overboard on the categories this year. I was inspired by browsing through an old Best & Worst Digest of '96... (i.e. Best Shows: Y&R/DAYS/GH; Most Disappointing Show: ATWT; Worst Story: Roger's Gaslighting on GL; Best Story: GH's Cassadine saga, etc... Good times).
BEST RETURN: Tamra Judge, RHOC. From the moment she reclaimed her orange on Watch What Happens Live, we knew we were in for something good. And boy, did she deliver. Right out of the gate, she caused drama with old friends, made new enemies, and even managed to alienate the newbie that she brought on to the show! Yes, I will admit she went a tad overboard and could’ve held some of her cards for the next season, but she wanted everyone to remember why she makes for good reality TV. Welcome back Tamra [and welcome back Eddie, one of the finest Househusbands].
WORST RETURN: Kelly Bensimon, RHUGT: RHONY Legacy. If Kelly was hoping to repair her image and show the world she’s not “CRAZY KELLY,” she fell flat on that conquest. A mere three episodes in, and she has already shown us she has not changed one bit from her days of Scary Island, Chef. Vs. Cook, I’m Up Here / You’re Down Here, You Called Me Madonna, and other aloof, unintelligible, and contradictory remarks that make her so frustrating to watch.
BEST FRIEND-OF RETURN: Mary Cosby, RHOSLC. She’s mean, she’s judgmental, she doesn’t want to participate in anything. Yet, she’s here and we’re here for it. Oh sure, not everyone is going to agree with me on this one, but her outspokenness is like listening to a 90-year-old woman with no filter, not giving a damn who she insults. It made for outrageous reality TV, which is what this franchise needed for the first half of the season.
BEST EXIT: Lisa Rinna, RHOBH. She’s gone and that’s what matters. On pause, on rest, temporarily fired, who cares what the spin may be. She’s out, which is what RHOBH needed to continue.
BEST NEWCOMER, Part I: Monica Garcia, RHOSLC. Without seeing the finale or reunion, she has thus far been a welcome addition to the Beehive State. Perhaps she is graded on a curve because RHOSLC was in desperate need of new blood and new alliances. Whatever the case may be, she has opened up more so than the majority of her cast members have given us in four years.
BEST NEWCOMER, Part II: Jennifer Pedranti, RHOC. OC has had trouble finding solid newcomers in recent years, so when Jennifer Pedranti was brought in as a friend of Tamra’s my initial thought was: Another busty blonde named Jen; another one season wonder. How delightful to see I was wrong. Jennifer has been a welcome addition to the cast and will hopefully forge new friendships with other cast members next season since her “friend” Tamra treated her like trailer trash (how ironic).
WORST NEWCOMER: Sai De Silva, RHONY. When the OG of the original cast says you’re a dud, you’re a dud. I can see Bravo going either way: give her another year to try to endear herself to the audience, or Katie Rost her ass and bring in someone fabulous to replace her.
BEST TREND, Part I: Old Housewife, New City. (Taylor Armstrong, from BH to OC). We’ve seen cast crossovers in the past, but never in this capacity. From the moment we were re-introduced to our favorite girl from Oklahoma, she looked like she belonged in Orange County all along. She fit the show and the show fit her, so it is a shame to hear she will not be back next season. Our loss. However, let’s hope the door is not closed on potentially bringing back old faces in new territories. [How about a more permanent stay for Cynthia Bailey on RHOBH…?]
BEST TREND, Part II: Guest Appearances. We’ve seen many former housewives return at party functions all the time. But a guest appearance from a former Wife is extra delicious when it actually drives story. Charrisse’s return to the Potomac fold reignited an old feud between her and Karen Huger. Denise Richards popping back in on RHOBH has caused the old, ugly nasty demeanor of Erika Jayne to resurface. And the OG of them all, Vicki Gunvalson, returned to RHOC to reunite the Tres Amigas, for better or worse, and added layers of laughter and drama during the cast trip. [Plus, who doesn’t love the side comments of Camille Grammer and the morally corrupt Faye Resnick at dinner?]
WORST TREND, Part I: Producer Interference. Housewives have become improvisational soap operas. Set up the time, place, characters, and bullet point topics to discuss and GO! From endless desperate attempts to recreate dinner parties from hell, to awkward conversations that real friends would never discuss in front of other people, the “realness” of Real Housewives has been sorely lacking for nearly a decade, with no signs of reverting back to the more simple days of Kim and Nene getting dressed for a party in a parking lot, or having on-the-fly talking head shots on a city sidewalk.
WORST TREND, PART II: Previews of Clips that Don’t Make It On Air. You’re flat out lying to the audience with these bait and switch promo tactics. Show it or stop it.
WORST TREND, PART III: Not airing the opening themes. It is the most iconic aspect of the Housewives brand. Why keep it out of so many episodes?
MOST CRINGEWORTHY MOMENT: Drew Sidora singing to Ralph at the RHOA Reunion. Drew and Ralph’s crumbling marriage was the frontburner story in the second half of the season, filled with rumors of cheating on both sides. Despite their impending divorce and whispers of Drew being with another woman, Ralph appeared at the reunion and Drew sang… directly to him… on camera… with everyone else watching. Iconic.
BEST NEW CATCHPHRASE: "Name 'em!" by Sutton Stracke, RHOBH. An instant new Housewives classic meme.
BEST FEUD: Heather vs. Everyone, RHOC. The gang up on Heather Dubrow was unnecessary, yet the fabulous ice queen of the OC paid them dust every single time. Heather’s life, her solid marriage, her real estate porn, etc. automatically makes her a winner against the jealous “peasant” castmates. On the finale episode, Tamra was looking to create a moment, yet Heather shot her down flawlessly. It’s a pleasant surprise to hear Heather is returning next season, because she’d be a shoo-in as the next Wife to jump to another series (RHOBH). I can’t wait to see how she handles the heifers next year.
WORST FEUD: Teresa Guidice vs. Melissa Gorga, RHONJ. This has been exhausted to point that nobody’s a winner, including us viewers. Clearly, these family members hate one another. Hate. It’s no longer trainwreck TV. It’s just a cringy mess with no good outcome. I am legit surprised the entire cast is returning for 2024. Runners up: Margaret vs. Jennifer, RHONJ. Same reason. Enough is enough.
BEST ALLIANCE: Garcelle and Sutton’s friendship, RHOBH. Rarely do we see a friendship where they truly have each other’s backs, even when one person is wrong, but these two are thick as thieves and will always support one another.
WORST ALLIANCES: The cliques of Real Housewives of Potomac. This show is slipping into toxic territory. There is a clear line in the sand of who likes who and who wants the other one gone. Much like old-school RHONY where everyone is strategizing to ice out the outsider, this is another game where we the audience end up the losers.
BEST QUEEN OF THEIR CITY: Karen Huger, RHOP. The Grande Dame knows her role of the show, which is currently to be the bridge and peacemaker amongst the fighting, petty arguments, and all out hatred. Still, in the midst of being that proverbial fence, her humor and essence brings lightness and fun to a show that has lost some of its luster.
BEST QUEEN OF THE FORMER OG’s: Luann de Lesseps, RHONY. Sure, the original RHONY is likely to never return as we knew it, but we just can’t count out the Countess. Whether she’s reappearing on an Ultimate Girls Trip or being spun off to Crappie Lake, there’s always a home for Luann on Bravo in some capacity. Here’s to hoping she and Sonja get a second season of their Simple Life-like series.
BEST SHOW: Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Good or bad, they know who they are, and they own it… unless they’re at risk of getting booted off the show (Hi Dorit; Hi Erika). Just when we think they’re down, they come back swinging. Real drama in their lives (Hi Kyle & Mauricio!) always makes for excellent reality television, versus manufactured petty drama about something stupid like cheese. Bravo wisely cut their losses with their most toxic cast member (Rinna), got rid of some dead weight (Diana… who?), and truly lucked out when the messy Mo & Kyle separation made the headlines.
MOST IMPROVED SHOW: Real Housewives of Orange County. After some truly lackluster seasons, it felt like old home week with the return of Tamra Judge in the fold, immediately causing mayhem after mayhem, revitalizing the original Housewives show that started it all. Everyone stepped their game up this season, from Heather to Shannon, to perennial underdogs Gina and Emily. We even got another new Jen (Pedranti), who has legs to last another season.
MOST TOXIC SHOW: Real Housewives of New Jersey. Guidice vs. Gorga; Margaret vs. Jennifer; newbies getting ugly right off the bat… With an endless family feud that has sunken to the point of no return, it’s hard to imagine they have filmed yet another season with the current cast intact. Surely, 2024 will be its final year showcasing them all. Right? Please say yes, Bravo.
MOST DISAPPOINTING SHOW: Real Housewives of Atlanta. Once upon a time, RHOA was the bread and butter of Bravo, breaking Nielsen records left and right. Nowadays, it is a shell of its former self. While we enjoy seeing familiar faces like Kandi, Kenya, and Sheree, nearly everything fell flat this year. The ensemble cast does not gel together as a cohesive group of friends, and newer faces like Drew and Sanya just aren’t enticing viewers to tune in. A major overhaul is expected and much needed. Could a much-missed blast from the past being returning to snatch her peach back…? Bloop!