Week 22, Part II -- Conclusion
Monica: "... If we put all of Alan's girlfriends end to end, we would have our own version of Hands Across America."
Alan & Monica: Even with Laurelton taking up most of the week's oxygen, Stuart Damon & Leslie Charleson had the best scenes, happening on Wednesday. What else could it be but the estranged couple's first mandatory marriage counseling session? Once Alan and Monica learn that their sessions will determine A.J.'s custody, and Monica finds out that Alan wants alimony and child support, the gloves go from off to thrown out of the ring. It eventually results in name calling ("You're a tramp!" "You're a liar!" "You're a slut!" "And you're an animal!" "And you're a witch, Monica!" "You're a creep!") and smacking each other with bataka bats. No matter how many times I watch the scene, I lose it when Alan spanks Monica.
Before this, there's another moment of scary Alan, at the Floating Rib during the post-marriage party Monica's blackmailed into throwing for Lorena and Derek. I already know that Lorena's last episode is on Wednesday, June 11, and I doubt that she and Monica will have any more interactions before then. I already know that most of the cast will be at the Policeman's Ball, but I think Lorena will only interact with Derek, Rick, and Ginny.
Mike's Parentage: Similar to Laurelton, there's an 11th-hour moment this week that doesn't come anywhere close to making up for weeks of tedium, but is still pretty satisfying. I'm talking about on Wednesday, when Mike has a heart to heart with Ginny after he's chosen to live with Derek and Lorena. It's not about getting to live the good life, with a new wardrobe and private bathroom. It's about Mike finishing his teen years with his biological father, which Mike expects will improve his self-understanding. That's nice. I still want to fast-forward to when Mike's off the show. I've got nothing against David Mendenhall or Judith Chapman. I just don't want to deal with any ending fatigue.
Bryan & Debbie: They get a grand total of around five minutes on Tuesday. Willie is considered well enough to get a summer job (as a paperboy). Once the adults are alone, Bryan reminds Debbie about when she said she was falling in love with him (a moment that happened more than a month ago). Bryan says he thinks he's falling in love with Debbie, too. And for all I know, this all will be resolved on the Fourth of July.
Jade & Yank: Or rather, just Yank. Patrick Bishop shows up for the first time in weeks on Thursday for some scenes with Jackie Zeman and Kimberly McCullough. I'm beyond glad that Laurelton is wrapped up, but it was sweet to see Bobbie and Robin bonding during the babysitting. Anyway, Robin gets a new doll, of an imperial lady-in-waiting. Yank says Robin should name the doll Jade, and when he's alone with Bobbie, he admits to fearing that he's losing (the living) Jade. The youth are only communicating by letters, and Jade says she's bound by her family ties and must honor her grandfather's wishes. If Mr. Wu says Jade can't be with Yank because Wu's still mad about Yank killing Kim, then she must agree to this. You'd think that Mr. Wu being an evil, bail-jumping scum would nulify his authority, but ... Bobbie says that when you love somebody, you have to trust that love. I don't know when this story will resume, either.
Stray thoughts:
-- Nice of Ruby to run a tab for the Quartermaines. I hope that in addition to the rent and food expenses due to her, Ruby got or at least was offered a cut of the Pickle-Lila profits.
-- I should really bother to learn the name of the blonde nurse that Monica consulted with on Tuesday. She's not Gaby, who started the trouble with Alan and Monica in the first place. Well, really it was Arthur, who had the nerve of dying and launching Alan's midlife crisis. The nurse is also not Carrie, niece of the dearly departed Mrs. McCormick, who gets a shoutout during Alan & Monica's therapy session. The nurse had a quick tryst with Alan, then went out with Patrick earlier this year. I'll have to see if blondie hangs around, or is gone by the time of H. Wesley Kenney.
By
Franko ·
