The Cocktail Lounge

[All My Shadows]

I actually did some investigating, and he seems to be pretty into her lol Oh well.

[MissLlanviewPA]

Guys, it's been awhile since I've been really active here, but there's something I just have to share:

As of today, I officially (Facebook officially, LOL) have my very first boyfriend. It only took until I was almost 25! But he's a great guy, and I'm really happy to be with him. He's the first guy I've ever dated, and he truly was worth the wait.

ETA: Oddly enough, he's younger than me! He's about to turn 21. I guess my thing about older men isn't completely accurate after all! LOL

[alphanguy74]

Congrats!!! I'm so happy for you!

[SFK]

Ditto! You are such a sweetheart, I wish you the very best!

[All My Shadows]

So, I'm getting much closer to making this happen with this weird anime/gamer guy from work. I can never see myself in an actual relationship with him, but given that he's bi, his girlfriend lives in another state, and I've gotten him wrapped around my finger, I'm sure I'll be able to get it whenever I'm ready for it.

[Soapsuds]

Recently I posted something on Facebook and my aunt blabbed it to my mom. She isnt even a friend of mine on FB yet she had the nerve to tell my mom about it. Seriously she needs a life.

[All My Shadows]

What exactly is the professional thing to do when a person calls you to set up a job interview, and you're really not interested in the job? I didn't turn in an application of any sort, but she heard about me from a personnel director (even though I'd told said personnel director that I wasn't interested in the job). I figured the best thing to do would be to set up the interview, go to it, and then if I were to receive a call later on about the job, just politely decline. Little did I know that the woman basically planned on me accepting the job offer on the spot. Didn't have any kind of interview questions set up, no attempt at all to know anything about me, no desire for me to "sell" my abilities for the job, etc. I wasn't interested to begin with, but after witnessing how absolutely desperate she was, my interest level decreased even more. What's more, she seemed to be a weird combination of heartbroken and pissed when I told her I wasn't interested.

So, what exactly did I do wrong in this situation? I'm thinking I should have just told her straight up that I wasn't interested, but I've done that before, and I've been told that you "always" want to go to an interview, even if you don't think you'll want the job. I feel like I may have wasted her time, but the whole thing honestly took less than five minutes. Should I have just taken the job?

[Mr. Vixen]

I probably would have just taken the job lol, anyone who wants you THAT bad is bound to provide a luxurious work environment, ha!

But in all seriousness - you didn't do anything wrong.

[All My Shadows]

LOL! Long story short, this school is on the crappy side of town. I live in the north end of the parish, and that's the area I know and love. This school is on the east side, which has a very bad reputation (that it's earned). I know nothing about the school, but I've heard some pretty unpleasant things about it, so that's why I didn't even send an application to her or contact her or anything. She was clearly desperate, to be honest, and I'm sure she thought I'd just stroll in and accept the job, no questions asked. I probably could have went there in my pajamas with a bottle of Jack and still have been offered the job.

[Mr. Vixen]

I probably wouldn't have taken it either. Something that is right for you will come along soon, I'm sure. It's good that you know yourself well enough to know that it wasn't the right place for you. Sometimes it's just best to go with your gut.

[All My Shadows]

Thanks. I just have a habit of assuming that I've messed up in some way. I'm kinda worried that this might muck up my chances of getting to be at a school that I actually want to be at. IDK. My career has been on a rollercoaster the last few months. I had my dream job at the beginning of the school year, but the circumstances were not the best, and I ended up quitting five days into it. I've done a good job of figuring out what went wrong for me, so I'm ready to get back out there, but the principal at the school I want says that he needs me to go somewhere else first, which I understand completely. Ugh. It's just so hard to get into the job I want.

[Mr. Vixen]

Okay, so I have a story and I need y'alls help.

Okay, here's a little background. Ever since I relocated a few years ago, I had a few pretty close friends in that city. They were probably my closest friends there (though certainly not my best friends overall, if you know what I mean). Anyway, it was five of us, but this story pretty much just involves the three of us- One of the three I was pretty consistently close to for over two years (with the exception of a BRIEF falling out, which was less of a "falling out" and more of a "we were both going through a lot and grew a part for a little while", if that makes sense). The other, I have been close with with the exception of a major falling out for about 6 months, a year and a half ago.

Anyway, for about a year now the three of us had been fine, all going through a lot in our individual lives but managing to stay in touch/close. Well, two of us have actually moved to different cities now and a few months back, out of nowhere, one of them, Sabrina, just stopped speaking to me, stopped returning my calls, texts, emails, etc. After a few weeks I stopped trying to get in touch, but it was crazy - we had never had a falling out. We hadn't spoken in about a month because our lives were both hectic but the last time we had spoken we were completely fine, to the best of my knowledge. The conversation was very nice. Well, one day I tried to call her to see how she was and she didn't answer. After several more calls and texts, I realized she wasn't speaking to me and I was unclear as to why but I have always had the philosophy that I will not stalk someone and force them to speak to me - if they do not want to talk to me, that's there loss and BYE! Ha!

Well anyway, it naturally bothered me/hurt a bit to think that this person was just not speaking to me so I asked our other friend, Brooke, if she had heard from her or if Sabrina had said anything. Well Brooke basically said she hadn't spoken to Sabrina in weeks and that she had never said anything to her.

Well, a few weeks ago I decided to pay visit to Brooke. Naturally, we had a lot to drink and we ended up going to a club and getting asked to leave (LOL), but she ended up passing out but I was wide awake and when I am drunk, I don't get belligerent really, I get very deep in thought. The situation started praying on my mind and I got the bright idea that I should look through Brooke's phone and see if Brooke had been telling the truth about not speaking to Sabrina/saying Sabrina hadn't mentioned me at all. (From the VERY beginning I felt that Brooke was being dishonest and that she knew more than she let on.)

Now look - I know it's wrong to go through someone's phone. But it all started because she asked me to send a text her phone and the contacts/messages were next to each other on the list. I feel badly about doing it. She really wouldn't care about me looking through her phone normally - we are close enough that we do that with each other. However, she would flip if she knew I read THESE messages.

Here's where the problem starts -

The messages that I found were NOT what I was expecting. Not only had Sabrina said PLENTY about me, but they had talked extensively about it and both said hateful, horrible things about me, some of which I know for a fact they (individually) know are not true. I won't get in to detail but there were a lot of nasty things said, including them laughing behind my back and making fun of a very hard time I was going through. Not to mention they said nasty things about other friends of mine and even made comments about a family member of mine.

So now I don't know what the !@#$%^&*] to do. How do I confront her about it when I shouldn't even know? She's the type who will get so hung up on the fact that I read those messages that she'll never agree to HAVE the conversation that needs to be had. But yet, I'm not going to go on pretending this bitch is my friend, when I know these things. Part of me says just cut her off all together and part of me says I should just write a long letter, reading her like a book, and just never associate with her again.

Also, the other two members of the "group" I mentioned, to my knowledge, have no knowledge of any of what was said. They were never particularly fond of Sabrina and Brooke anyway, and it was kind of one of those situations where they hungout with them because of me type deals.

Help?

[SFK]

Wow, so who are you more mad with, Sabrina for cutting you out or Brooke for being two-faced? Or is it pretty even? I was in a situation where I read messages on somebody's phone and while I know that it's wrong to snoop, I do not regret it one bit because my gut was 100% in the right and I got the truth that I needed to know (not to mention that I'm positive this person snooped through my things "just 'cause"). I didn't confront this person with what I knew. I was hurt but quickly realized that I didn't care all that much. I have however continued to be very kind and friendly to this person who I care for to a degree that many would say is undeserved but perhaps that's my payback, that they have to live with the guilt of what they did to me knowing how good I've been to them. I think this has worked because the person in question doesn't respond to my texts anymore. I think they're trying to give me a reason to stop liking them. Now that I've written that all out I feel kind of sad and guilty. =/

[Nate4]

I've learned guy friends are way better then girl friends. Too much bullshit.

[alphanguy74]

I would cut her off altogether, as Maya Angelou says "The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them". And the letter is a good idea.