Jump to content

Great Pitch, Poor Execution


Recommended Posts

  • Members

We've all heard the maxim that entertainment is created by committee.  As a result, a writer could make an excellent pitch only to have it squandered by poor acting choices, bad directing, cheap sets, odd makeup, ugly hair, terrible casting, horrible breakdown writers, or even awful background music.  I would bet that there are dozens of writers who felt unfairly blamed for a bad plot line, when in reality the idea was good, but the production messed up the execution of the story.

I'll start the list with a controversial example. 

After the trauma of her daughter being kidnapped, her husband leaving her to care for a sick relative, and her son (who was switched at birth) being killed in car accident, a female cop turns to Xanax to help with sleep.  Eventually she becomes addicted to the prescription and rather than admitting her dependency she blames her emotionally unstable daughter.  Hitting rock bottom, she looses her job on the police force and becomes addicted to gambling.  That,of course, could have been the pitch for Nighttime Hope.  As bad as the story was produced, I maintain the idea was valid.

Here's another

Soaps have a history of ripping stories from the headlines.  The NXIVM cult seized the imagination of the country through true crime podcasts and documentaries.  The cult preyed on young women by promising empowerment, but they became enslaved by revealing secrets that would be harmful if they were revealed.  Now imagine Kristina Corinthos-Davis, a young woman who felt neglected by her career-driven mother, dropped out of college, and recently broke up with her first female romantic relationship.  That story would become GH's Dawn of the Day cult story.  The writer who pitched it had no idea that it would stretch out so long, or that the actor hired to lead the cult would not be charismatic, or that story would devolve into a fight over memory chips.  Again, probably a good pitch that was poorly executed.

The obvious sarcastic response would be that the original ideas were inherently flawed (which is why Oscar Wilde said that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit).  Or this whole thread will take an unpredictable tangent into discussing the career of Coby McLaughlin.  However, my intention is that I am interested in your perspective as viewers of stories that seemed like a good idea, but went wrong in execution. 

Edited by j swift
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 28
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Members

I like this topic. The first one that comes to mind is Casey the alien on General Hospital. It seems like it might have worked if the writers had kept the story limited to Anna and Robin, both vulnerable in the wake of what was then believed to be Duke dying for good. Expanding the story to Port Charles' latest bad guy (Faison), while understandable (since I'm sure they didn't want to just rip off E.T.), sorta undermined the emotional aspect.

ETA: Re-reading the Curlyqgrl summaries of 1990, it looks as though the Casey storyline was always intended to have both the emotional, relatable stuff (Anna and Robin), plus the action adventure (If Faison gets Robin's crystal, he could destroy the world!). I stand by my appraisal, though. Feels like GH was trying to meet its adventure quota for the year.

Edited by Franko
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

The Sonni/Solita storyline (GL) had "good bones," as they say, but the protracted '88 WGA strike made the story so convoluted that literally no one knew or understood what it was about anymore.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I could literally fill in pages of stories I would mention. I am an optimist but I'd say two-thirds of bad stories start with a pitch I might have said Maybe to.
For instance, 80% of the Bold and the Beautiful in the past ten years qualifies for me. Love a lot of the ideas on paper and then the weird pacing or weird narrative choices just ruins most of it.

Controversially, that's for instance how I feel about Eric's ED story. I find the idea of a story about an older man and a younger wife struggling with his ED and what it means for their marriage and his sense of self and her coping with how to handle her sexuality is in theory a really rich organic conflict for a couple that could make for great soap.
Instead it was played fast, cartoony and then when they added the layers of offensive with the cuckolded-by-a-black-man aspect there was no salvageable it
However, while people reacted badly as soon as it was floated, I think it could have had merits if told better as psychological soap rather than twist-and-affairs kind of soap.

But I have so many. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Guiding light 

Reva jumping off the bridge in late 1985 looked like a good idea because we've seen the path to rock bottom play out for 2 years...and had Pam Long not left in January 1986, we could have seen Reva rebuild her life in a organic way.  However, we saw her as a nursing volunteer and her taking in the mystery man Cane before she went back to Kyle then Josh again..all in a years time.

Young and the Restless 

Patty's return as Mary Jane masterminded by Victor seemed good on paper..and she was played with conviction by Stacy H....but the writers made her crazy..and it was written as camp instead of a serious story of mental illness.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

No, bringing back Patty Williams after a twenty-five year absence as a garden-variety psycho, who concealed her true identity in order to win back the ex-husband she once shot multiple times, was an idea that looked bad even "on paper."

Same goes for bringing back Phillip Chancellor, whom we saw die on-screen, with the explanation that he faked his death because he was in the closet.

Edited by Khan
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

That’s where the plot went off the rails. He should have stayed dead. But Cane as a con artist playing on the grief of Jill and the Chancellors at least could have been more interesting than what played out. His characterization was all over the place, and he should have been a short-term character ultimately.

And the casting was all wrong, of course.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Y&R 

Neil's blindness: the concept of Neil being blind and Devon sleeping with his dad's wife Hillary would have been executed way better during the WJB era.

Mariah:  Victor gaslighting Sharon with a Cassie lookalike that turned out to be Cassie's long lost twin was a sick plot that further dragged Victor's charachter down. However, it would have a been better done psycological plot -- like the George Rawlins murder-- had WJB's team written it. Morover it would have been helped by the epic background music, shadowy lighting and camera angles of the 90s.

B&B Justin tries to take over Spencer. Justin using Vinny's framing of Bill & Liam for his suicide to take over the latter's company could have played out over monts. We could have gotten longterm ramifications with Bill wrestling for control over his comany as we got with Forresters & Brooke or Jabot being controlled by Newman back in the day.

Edited by ironlion
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I agree with this! The premise of pairing Rick with a trans woman could have been groundbreaking.

But there were three major mistakes in the storytelling.

The first was doing this reveal about a character whose backstory included a pregnancy and searching for the child she gave up for adoption.

The second was making the storyline too conflict-free. Maya met with virtually no resistance and ended up getting her every wish fulfilled without even having to fight for it (since all of her struggles had already taken place off screen before we met her).

The third was introducing Maya as the heroine in this storyline when she was already in the middle of another storyline where she and Rick were the villains, and then painting other characters' legitimate dislike of Maya as transphobic, as if her being trans suddenly made her immune to criticism. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.



  • Recent Posts

    • @Toups Tyler Topits listed in alpha order with the breakdown writers 5/12 Monday episode. O'Connor still listed as both breakdown and script writer. Kreizman wrote today's script.
    • Marland was long gone by this point.  He quit in either August/September 1982. I think it was due to letting the actress play out her contract and use her for party scenes and/or scenes with Phillip/Justin.   I was surprised she was still on in June 1983 myself, because I figured she had been written out before Pam Long joined the writing staff. Thankfully, having episodes uploaded during this period on Spauldingfield YT site has helped to connect some of the dots.  It looks as though Pam Long starts the first week or so of May 1983.. and in those first few weeks: Morgan and Evie were both written off and Lillian/Mindy/Billy/Beth/Annabelle all come onto the show.    
    • @MaximThis really  old song popped into my head this morning .... 

      Please register in order to view this content

       
    • For any military veterans and family: Military discount for *NEW* subscribers for any type of ParamountPlus subscription, "for the life of the subscription" (whatever that means). Includes: active duty, retirees, reservists and National Guard, veterans, dependents and spouses. Military veterans will receive 50% off new subscriptions (They have a verification process) https://help.paramountplus.com/s/article/Does-Paramount-offer-Military-discounts For existing subscribers, who would be eligible but haven't used the discount: (from the same paramount help link) Question: I’m an existing ParamountPlus subscriber in the military. How do I get the discount? Answer: To take advantage of the military discount offer*, you’ll first need to cancel your existing subscription, then re-subscribe to Paramount+ [at the verification link] on your desktop or mobile browser. During the signup process, your credentials will be verified to confirm your current status. Once you've been verified, your discount will be applied in the next billing cycle.
    • What a lovely gif!!!!!! @Maxim

      Please register in order to view this content

        @Maxim  
    • I didn’t find it that interesting

      Please register in order to view this content

    • I can't watch until later (Canada issues). What is Philip's motivation for stealing the drug? Only plot I cared about today and you did not mention it 
    • Doug III’s first day of work. Hope he does a good job… or that Tate tries to sabotage him somehow

      Please register in order to view this content

      His scenes with Holly were nice though. They’re sweet together and I understand why some people think that they have more chemistry than Tate/Holly do. And I liked that Doug III opened up to her about his past. Maybe that could lead to something good happening in the future.  I also enjoyed Roman and Kate, and how they’re both being tied into EJ’s shooting. The mystery of it all is really compelling. I don’t think Roman is the shooter though either.  I didn’t have much sympathy for Kristen though. She has no one to blame for Rachel’s problems than herself. But at the same time, I’m really surprised that Days actually remembered the Alex/Kristen fling. I thought Ron had erased that from existence. I’m not shipping them at all, but I’m definitely shipping a permanent end to Brady/Kristen but after today, I’m not so sure about that either.  And, Johnny and Chanel were still great together
    • https://parade.com/news/beyond-the-gates-actor-flexes-like-a-wrestler-in-viral-shirtless-photo
    • Some country club revelation thoughts from a casual watcher no one asked for. The Great: Daphnee Duplaix gave the best performance we've seen yet. Nicole's dialogue was also well thought out and felt character specific. TJ Maxx Ted was also pretty good. Trisha Mann-Grant steals every scene she's in. Often without even trying. Carrying multiple episodes worth of exposition heavy soap dialogue with starts and stops and recapping and drama and humor is no small feat and she nailed. Vernon telling Lesliana to STFU.  The Bad: So much of the dialogue for the rest of the cast was overly written. Martin said "You are a vile human being with a hole in your heart!". Marty, what are we doing? It's SO dramatic and sounds so silly coming from this grown man. Do Bill and Hayley do anything but talk about the Duprees? And the nerve of her to get so excited to find out Ted is a cheater when she and her husband are too. There should be a hint of shame mixed in with your glee, ma'am. The Questionable: Coffee and a rendition of Amazing Grace after finding out Nicole was betrayed by her husband. The Duprees are an odd bunch. The stinger of one segment had Anita prepared to lambast Lesliana, when we came back someone else was talking. When Anita eventually said something to Wig, it was a lukewarm at best. And then of course she thought singing a song about something that should absolutely not be extended to her son-in-law. The entire family allowing this deranged woman to speech at them in their own was...nuts. I know she said something about what would the neighbors say but my GOD. Is she just going to be allowed to trespass whenever she feels like it now? The focus on Leslie and her wig usage as an oddity is...odd. I think Chelsea said something like "and she wears wigs!" (while wearing a buss down middle part). Okay? It's just not that odd for a black woman to change up her hair. It's the different names that's the problem. I know it's meant to be humorous, in a throwback soap kind of way, but it fell flat for me.  I'm sorry I find the whole family to be WEIRD. It's like they want us to see them as ruthless yet benevolent, open yet furtive, snobbish yet tooth achingly sweet all at the same time. I cannot get a lock on the family dynamics. Everyone is just there.  I'm gonna cry if this show doesn't start giving us ages (or close to it!) for these characters. Because if Eva is 21-22 then Martin was being given crayons, a soda pop and blinders when he was 15-17 years old. Martin had to have been under 8 for me to buy this story, which would make Eva and Kat late 20s (Martin is at least 35 since he wants to run for president), which I don't think they're meant to be. It's honestly minor but it bothers me. I've mentioned this to @Vee but I think the optics on opening the show with both sisters discovering their husbands of over 30 years are cheaters should've been considered. I doubt there was any intention behind it, no one's rubbing their hands together as they scheme to say the married black men can't stay loyal but how does it look? Maybe it's just me. Honestly it's probably just me!
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy