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For some perverse reason reading this "autobiography" feels like it's written decades ago. It's like hearing an echo from the past... a distant scream in a windy night... But when you realize it was actually created not that long ago... you get really creeped out. It's like... She's here. And she is still speaking... telling how they destroyed her, backstabbed her. In a daytime Baby Jane kind of way.

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I think it's because the soap world she speaks of started dying 25-30 years ago and entered what seemed to be a final stage 15 years ago. Other than a few names, most of that era are long gone. It is a very angry letter from the past, somehow washing up on our shores. 

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We just recently had that Jean Passanante retirement interview from 2017 resurface about her admitting regretting her story choices from ATWT’s final year (and hinting at probably a lot more). Now this comes bubbling up. I wonder who the next tell all will be about and from…LOL…

But you’re right. Even though 2005 still fees like yesterday to me and the troubles and wounds of all 9 soaps from that year still feel fresh, everyone except for Thudley, Corday  I guess FV, is long gone and an entire 20 year generation has passed. 

Thanks I’ll have to reread it. 

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I remember first seeing Michael Confronti as Malcolm on ATWT. Then later seeing his name pop up as a script writer for GL. I thought that dorky, cute, dumb guy knows how to write scripts?

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  So I can see him bragging to other writers about being hired as writer to spy on another.

Edited by Soapsuds
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I mean my gosh was that even necessary for her to do? Yikes!
 

It’s funny she speaks highly of Victor Miller yet trashes Conforti, when it was Miller and Conforti who had to clean up her mess at GL (for better or worse) in time for the 60th anniversary. 
 

Unlike McTavish at least Conforti had a long working career up until Josh Griffith laid him off in 2023. 

Wouldn’t be the first time in daytime either nor the last

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LOL. Funny enough he jumped ship off AMC back in 2003 just as she came back.

I vaguely recall there being a vicious soap article from June 2003 detailing the salacious details about JER’s return to Days and McTavish’s return to AMC. I may have to dig it up. 
 

Going back to Conforti I wonder if some of her anger was directed at him for being a Friend of Jill, except being a writer instead of actor lol? He had worked under her at GL obviously but then she hired him later on at GH and then again at Y&R.

Edited by soapfan770
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It makes me feel old but also feels like no time has passed until I remember it's been almost 15 years for OLTL and AMC. I am not sure why it still feels more sudden for them compared to ATWT and GL - maybe because the ABC cancelations still felt like more of a surprise, as ATWT and GL had been left for dead (especially GL). 

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I meant to reply to this but now that I’ve read it I love how well you summarized it as it definitely is a bit haunting to read. Fans have been bitter about her work for years, now to read she was angry and bitter individual is fascinating. 
 

A distant scream into a windy night indeed. Love it!
 

I really wonder how many of those she wrote about in this book have seen what she wrote . Yet some of it still connects to the present…

So true. While GL reached its natural conclusion, AMC and OLTL were canceled  very prematurely. Still I remember use to having small celebrations every year GL got renewed in the mid to late 00’s even as everything fell apart.

Funny McTavish doesn’t insult Frons does she? 

Obviously this memoir I realize now was written some time in 2012, yet it has connections to the present. She praises Beall and Beldner, who still write on Y&R to this day.

And of course most interesting is JHC and Cady are now on BTG together.

The most pertinent question I have now is where is McTavish in 2025?

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I just finished reading the whole thing tonight and was JUST coming on here to mention this haha.  I can't imagine JHC inserting Cady into BTG if she truly felt that way about her back in the day.  I know time heals and a gig is a gig these days....  oh but wait, I just googled the date when Dixie died of pancakes and it was 2007.  Her returns to AMC after that were still while JHC was EP, so she had to have been fine with Cady even then in 2010-2013. 

I'd LOVE to know where Megan is these days too.  I wonder if she's done any interviews in the last 5-10 years about soaps/AMC, etc.

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Something I have been thinking about since reading the McTavish proposal is the fact that it was found in Nixon's papers at Northwestern. That means at some point Nixon  procured it, read it, and filed it away.

I am curious to know who gave it to her? I doubt McTavish sent it to her personally.  (And this unpublished draft was definitely not vetted by lawyers, no matter what it says!) Maybe one of her contacts in the publication industry reached out and said "hey, there's this nutty book outline making the rounds with your name all over it..."

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