Bravo's The Real Housewives of....

[Mr. Vixen]

I don't think the men are getting a free pass - Everyone is disgusted with them and as Nene said in her blog, they are responsible for their actions. Kenya is getting the blame for being shady and triflin' and setting most of this into action and then acting like she's blameless.

I don't make it seem like Kenya was charging Natalie - she was! All of the people in the room have agreed. Even Kandi and Todd, who you and JP love so much, directly used the word CHARGED when referring to Kenya's actions. Nene didn't make it up and neither did I.

[JackPeyton]

You can keep pointing out who said the word charged and I can keep pouting you to people who say it wasn't. Kandi and Todd saying charged doesn't make it so. Neither do you nor nene. Just like me saying she didn't doesn't make it so. It's all perception.

I will say he nene who I hate done the same thing Kenya did I still wouldn't say it was charged. But would your view change?

And yes the men are getting a free pass. Defending their actions is the same as justifying it IMO.

You say none of this would have happened if Kenya hadn't gotten up. Why is the line there that was crossed and not when Christopher grabbed her? Why not when nene set the tone to promote a violent gathering? Why not Cynthia for telling gossip? Etc.

[ThePrinceOfSunspear]

Horrible article and like most posts on the gay portion of the HuffingtonPost I rolled my eyes at the end of it.

It's amazing how turnt up people will get over small fish like Nene but when the real important battles come around they all of sudden are no where to be found.

Don't get me wrong I'm sure what nene said was stupid and probably will sound ignorant but I honestly don't believe she's "homophobic" just because she said them.....

[JackPeyton]

Bless this post.

Nene outright is lying and it's painfully obvious. She's doing it because it doesn't fit her narrative to admit the truth and she looks bad. She's always controlled the narrative on this show and this is the first time that girl is being called out on her doing and it's glorious.

[Cheap21]

months after the fact in blogs, after seeing the videotapes. Im specifically talking about that table gathering when they discussed the events together for the first time. ALL the blame and focus was on Kenya. The men, especially Apollo's role was severely downplayed while Kenya's was magnified

I do not have a great love for Todd or Kandi. Thats your and JP's ride or die chick. I like and respect her for finally stepping up her game this season but Todd, I could take or leave

[Mr. Vixen]

I guess you're right - it is all perception. My view would not have changed, I don't think. If Nene had done what Kenya did, she would have been just as wrong as I feel Kenya was.

I'm very sorry if it came across that I was defending any of the men's actions as that was not what I meant to do. I think Apollo/Peter are absolutely disgusting. While I think Brandon overreacted, I commend him for defending Kenya and he proved, like you all said, that he is the only REAL man in that group (aside from Todd who wasn't involved). I HATE Christopher Williams, I think he is a pig & I think what he did was wrong. He should not have stood to address her, but he did not get up in her face the way Kenya was attempting to do to Natalie. As for him grabbing her, YES it was WRONG and inappropriate and I believe he owes her an apology. But I also do not think he did it to be violent or to hurt her, I think he was trying to protect his wife (who I also hate so it's not as if I'm stanning for the bitch), and I cannot fault him for that. I can, however, fault him for how he did it.

I do think Kenya crossed the line. Christopher was out of line, yes. Nene did not promote a violent gathering at all. She herself didn't touch anyone or encourage anyone to hit anyone - she held Kandi back and talked her down, for Christ' sake! But I do say Nene stirred [!@#$%^&*] up and played a role, as I've said all along. If you read my posts I have shaded Cynthia a LOT for starting this mess by running her mouth. It DOES all stem back to her. But on the bus that day KENYA chose to get involved in that woman's marriage, she chose to clown someone she DOESN'T KNOW in front of a group of her peers. Did she honestly not expect that Natalie/Chris would defend themselves? When she got called out, she decided to try and be a bad bitch by getting in Natalie's face and it caused things to escalate out of control. That's where I stand and you ain't gonna change my mind!

[JackPeyton]

You can not be homophobic and say homophobic things.

Nene is not homophobic.

However she did attack Brandon based on his sexuality. She used his sexuality against him. To deminish him and attack him. That is homophobic. She did this because she needs to make herself look good and because she needs to spin what happened.

You can not be racist and say racist things. Much like the Brandi/Joyce issue from BH.

It is a weird line and I wish I was better at explaining it but I'm not. I'm really not good with words and oddly scared of offending people when talking about stuff like this.

[Mr. Vixen]

I don't even think Nene meant to diminish Brandon based on his sexuality, but that is how it came off. However, I don't really think her calling him "miss" is as offensive as people are acting like it is. For Christ's sake we have a recurring person on this show named Miss Lawrence!

[ThePrinceOfSunspear]

Well speaking as a black gay guy I disagree but that's just me. I think you're making it black and white when reality is a multitude of grey.....

I just think people overreact and want to jump to the ultimate conclusion without judging the entire picture.

[JackPeyton]

The difference is he calls himself that. And it isn't said in a mean, deminish sing way.

I am gay. I never have referred to msy elf as miss anything. And if anyone does I do take it as a direct attack on me being gay. I'm not one of the girls. I am a man. Period.

He point would have gotten across if she called him mr, IMO. She choose miss for a reason and it was an attack.

The same for queen. She didn't say what a fab queen he is.

Now I don't know Brandon. I don't know a lot about him. But I've never seen him refer to himself as miss. But even if she had said this about Lawrence, the way she said it, I'd feel the same.

[Cheap21]

Gays come in all shapes and sizes. Gay men are still men and should be addressed and treated as such unless said individual says otherwise. Lawrence fully embraces his feminity, cross dresses, calls himself Miss Lawrence, stars on a show called Fashion Queens, etc... It wouldnt have been as much of an issue if she said this about Lawrence. I refer to him as she bc HE approves of it and wants people to do so. Brandon is not feminine nor does he portray himself as such. To use numerous terms to reference him as a woman IS a dig at his sexuality and is done to emasculate him. I can understand saying something once in the heat of the moment, without thinking but Nene has made multiple comments aimed at Brandon, from her scene with the girls, to talking heads to her blogs. Its clear seh wants to devalue his masculinity bc he is gay. Nothing he has done is even "queen" like. Brandon is hardly a diva, nor is he a gossip, sh-t stirrer, flamboyant, etc.. From all the scenes we have seen of him leading up to the party, he has always portrayed himself as masculine so Nene's digs are unfounded

ETA: Again, JP and I are in total agreement...lol. This feels so rare, yet is becoming a more common occurrence

Edited February 11, 2014 by Cheap21

[Mr. Vixen]

You make a good point. I just don't think that Nene would deliberately gay bash someone and I doubt she put as much thought into her words as we all seem to be. I have to say I was rolling at "your girlfriend in the red ball gown", and I never would have considered that to be a homophobic slur. Yes, it was probably inappropriate but nothing Nene said was malicious, at least not in her delivery. She didn't say "why did that stupid [!@#$%^&*] queen miss brandon DARE dial my number?" she threw shade but I didn't catch any vitriol behind it.

That being said - she should apologize and choose her words more carefully in the future.

The one issue with Nene - and I think the reason I ride so hard for her is because I can be the same way - is that if she didn't MEAN something the way it came across, she won't apologize. She didn't mean to emasculate Brandon, she just meant to throw shade. Now, her remarks came across poorly and she should clarify & apologize. But because she feels the intent wasn't negative, she doesn't see the need to apologize. And I think if she just did that, most of this would blow over.

[Antoyne]

Well I wouldn't call Brandon masculine myself, but I do agree with what you're saying Cheap.

[Cheap21]

thats a problem I have with Nene, that I first took issue with earlier on in the season when she attacked Cynthia as a mother, made her cry and then failed to apologize to her for it. Nene's actions are consistent and its definitely a character flaw IMO. Sometimes it takes being the bigger person and just saying Im sorry for the greater good, but that word is very hard to come out of her mouth when it needs to

[Mr. Vixen]

Finally, something agree on.

Same.

Lol i miss the days when we (for the most part) agreed on all things HW. Hopefully you'll come around.