Soap Opera Anachronisms (try saying that five times fast)

[j swift]

While watching the soaps on Friday, I was struck by the number of plot points that seem out of touch with contemporary culture.  So, I did a bit of research to see how common the following issues are in 2023

1. Sanitariums - obviously the word itself is obsolete, most are referred to as "mental health facilities".  The average stay in an acute hospital psychiatric unit is 4–7 days, at a cost of $1,000 per day.  While long term psychiatric residential programs average $30,000 a month and are very rare for adult patients, due to the favorable outcomes of community-based day treatment programs.   Drug rehabs are licensed separately from mental health centers, they are rarely locked, and they average $10,000 per stay.  Most private insurance carriers would not allow a drug rehab patient to be housed at a mental health facility because it is more expensive.  So the idea that citizens of Port Charles check themselves in, for months at a time, seems unlikely.  And don't get me started on the trope of the evil psychiatrist who either wants to use ECT, drugs, or restraints to control a patient, while in reality client's rights advocates would drum them out of a job in a second!
2. Private Detectives - according to the US Bureau of Labor Statistics there were 32,000 licensed private investigators, or two investigators for every 100,000 people in the entire country with an average annual income of $53,000 working as of May 2023.  To give you a sense of how small that number is, there are twice as many blackjack dealers or school bus monitors in the US.  So, what is the likelihood that a small town like Salem would have so many of them?  This is clearly a profession that has been made redundant by technology.  Most people wouldn't think of hiring a private detective when they could just do an online search, and 90% of cases involve background searches for prior court records, which seems boring for an action oriented guy like Patch Johnson.
3. Matchmakers - another job that seems to have been replaced by technology.  Yet, a New York Times piece in 2021 suggested that the average fee for a matchmaker in New York was close to $100,000. A recent episode of DAYS utilized the concept of a matchmaker in order to justify how two enemies could've been paired up on a blind date.  However, find me a Millennial in 2023 seeking a partner who isn't on an app that requires pictures like Tindr, Hinge, or even Christian Mingle!
4. Wealthy patients at University Hospitals - Salem and Port Charles are known for their medical education, and they've both graduated many doctors and nurses.  However, beyond the fact that none of the faculty has active research grants which is the primary source of income at university settings (schools usually take 30% of every federal grant), they are appointed without application through the University, and they never discuss tenure, why would the richest families in town seek treatment at a university hospital when private facilities exist?  In Los Angeles, most wealthy women would prefer to give birth at Ceders Sinai where they have luxurious private birthing rooms over UCLA where the maternity ward is old and communal.  

Those are some of the issues that were specific to the storytelling on July 21, 2023.  What are the other plot points that you've noticed that don't seem modern or up to date?

Edited July 23, 2023 by j swift

[Soaplovers]

Matchmakers should make a comeback... because most people in their 30s and younger don't seem to have good judgement/taste when it comes to picking someone to date.  Some of my friends were matched unofficially by a mutual friend and are still happily together so maybe tinder, etc isn't exactly a good thing

[Xanthe]

 

Other than Dark Shadows, have there been any period soaps? Everything I can think of is usually set as contemporary but when you layer on writers' generational unconscious bias (grandmothers are like this, teenagers are like that, except of course they are thinking of their own experiences of 20 or 30 years ago) plus conventions of the genre that may not have aged well you get these types of anachronistic issues. 

[Faulkner]

I think a lot of it is just laziness and hoping audiences suspend their disbelief. The recent example I cite of course is Ryan Chamberlain walking all over Port Charles killing people, including in places of business, and not being picked up on a gazillion security cameras, even just on the street. They’d have to be more creative if they took modern-day advances into account.

[j swift]

Thought of another one.

The use of DNA for amniocentesis - GH still uses the old plot of a family figuring out paternity when a loved one has an accident and someone has to donate blood.  Meanwhile, amnio tests have been standard since 1982, and in California it is a free option for prenatal care. So, it is unlikely that parents wouldn't know the genetic origins of their early adult children.  And don't get me started on why soap couples visit their OB-GYN in the hospital rather than their office, especially given the number of soap infants born in cabins during poor weather conditions!

Edited July 26, 2023 by j swift

[Xanthe]

In order to bother with the test you probably have to have some kind of suspicion. And even though GH is made in California it is set in New York.

I have just been watching some of the drama around Steven Frame's paternity in 1989. Before he was born Vicky started to panic and asked her OBGYN for a paternity test and the OBGYN said it was too dangerous and wouldn't be ethical for her to approve it. Vicky backed off but then after Steven's birth Jake found out that Steven's blood type was AB and suspiciously noted that his own blood type was AB. During the retcon that John could be Marley and Victoria's father a couple of years earlier,  Victoria was likewise suspicious when she found out that both she and John had the blood type AB. The thing that never seemed to be discussed is that blood type is not passed from the father to the child directly. Essentially you get one letter from each parent, and all you can do is use blood type to rule out the possibility that someone is the baby's parent. So if Vicky is AB and Steven is AB, anyone who is A, B, or AB could be Steven's father -- only someone with type O could be ruled out. I assume at this point these soap towns are crammed with people with AB blood and anyone could be anyone's father. 

[Contessa Donatella]

OMG! Think of the possible ramifications of that! 

[j swift]

Not to go too far afield, but Amniocentesis is a standard procedure in 90% of pregnancies of women making more $60,000 in the US.  It is done by DNA, not just blood type.  And Vicky was pregnant with Steven in 1989, prenatal care has progressed 34 years later, which is the point of this topic.

Edited July 26, 2023 by j swift