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YR Promo for this week

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I simply don't understand the lightning speed of every major story.

However, my theory is that Josh (Griffin, not Morrow, who is just showing up to work on time) is more concerned with the twist, throwing those pesky viewers off, than he is with the story.

  1. Diane's return was a SHOCKER. It got the show a lot of ink for a few days, and lapsed viewers went "OoooooH". Then, within a few weeks to a month (if that), everyone who mattered knew she was alive, and now, a year or so later, she's in story Siberia with Jack.
  2. Cameron Kirsten, a villain that viewers had been clamoring to resurrect (or at least fans of Sharon who wanted her to have a story that didn't involve her in a love triangle with people whose diapers she used to change). And they didn't have to LITERALLY resurrect him because he was ALIVE and in prison, and viewers knew this. They didn't have to pull shenanigans to bring him back. They could have easily brought him back after serving a 20-year prison sentence (in REAL TIME) as a long-term (or dear god at least six months) foil for the Newmans. I know some of us here would like to blame the mishandling of that story on Linden Ashby's availability. Well, guess what if you don't have the resources to tell a fully realized story two decades in the making? DON'T TELL THAT STORY. Write something else until you have him signed to a short-term contract or he's free to work on a soap for however long he's not booking guest spots or TV movies. My god, it's not like the man was starring in the latest Star Wars Disney+ series.
  3. Victoria killed her husband or something, I guess whothefuckknows and that was also a real shocking twist because uhhhh we saw the exit of handsome and talented soap legend Robert Newman. This wonderfully skilled man was brought on to portray a character who showed up (as the also handsome and talented Richard Burgi, himself a soap vet and primetime TV staple), did nothing of interest besides marrying a 50-year-old ingenue and died. Has he been mentioned since?
  4. As part of the anniversary festivities Joshy kicked off a story in which Phyllis faked her death as revenge against Diane. Big umbrella story, right? ripple effects across the whole canvas that would presumably last months, if not years. Within weeks, everyone who mattered discovered she was alive. The story culminated in her killing a man. Would you even classify that as a C story now (if it's even still going in any real capacity)? Because from what I can tell, it's done, and the show is moving her onto a story, featuring two recurring actors with nothing to do but certainly happy to reminisce in every scene they're in, where she's apparently going to pursue a man who has actively hated her for 30 years. You guys. You guys. She faked her DEATH in April. Of this year. Just...what was the reason for all of that nonsense?

I don't even watch the stupid show and those are the twist-y stories I can think of off the top of my head that were told at a breakneck pace and ultimately amounted to nothing.

Making a story work over months, if not years, is the lifeblood of daytime. But this this this MAN writes as if this show is a freaking weekly anthology series.

Tune in next week! Whatever happened this week may or may not matter! But we'll be sure to include endless, tedious scenes of billionaires and their multi-millionaire friends sipping coffee and discussing their latest employment decision.

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