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I can spin my wheels and talk about Sami all day and the bizarre grudge she has against John/Marlena, but I have said most of it before.  The first problem is we never saw or understood Sami's closeness with Roman outside the fact he was her biological father. Wayne had like 10 scenes with those kids before they SORASed her. The second thing is we saw John raise her since childhood and by all accounts it was a happy childhood. 

I understand it was traumatizing.  I understand it ruined her already shaky family, but it happened so long ago and she still brings it up.  The fact that Roman(especially) and Marlena weren't immediately sending Sami off to a psych facility after she kidnapped her own sister and changed paternity results at 15 is mindblowing.

Shut up Sami!  Marlena and John have been together for the last 25 years for the most part.  It's over.  Roman's good with it.  Everyone else in town is good with it.  I will give Sami a mild pass for the stuff she did as a teen, but she blames all her behavior on that to this day as a 45 year old woman.  I often wonder how Marlena doesn't slap every time she brings the affair up.  And I actually like Sami, but her excuses and ridiculousness can wear quite thin because there is no real basis for her bad actions except she's just not a good person.

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That's what I'm saying - and as someone who needs to know why a character behaves the way he/she does, it wears thin on me as well.

Exactly.  Yet, my heart is supposed to go out to Sami every time she mentions the affair to John and Marlena.  It makes no sense to me.  I've TRIED to make it make sense, but I can't.  To me, it's just lazy writing.

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I don't think she has - or if she has, someone at the show has forgotten.  But I have heard her mention it again in recent years, which had me rolling my eyes and going, "Here we go again!".

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I could swear it happened in the Sheffer years, or post-Salem Stalker, and stood for a while. They would still blow up on occasion but they understood each other. Then I think someone made it come crashing down. And yes, Sami's obsession with this given John raised her has driven me nuts for close to 30 years.

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That's possible.  Truth be told, I haven't watched DAYS on a consistent basis since, gosh, 1993?  I've popped in for spells, got disgusted, then popped out.  Wash, rinse, repeat.  So, it's possible the reconciliation occurred during a period when I wasn't following as closely.  Nevertheless, I feel as if the affair is still motivating Sami's actions to a point.  She's never really matured from being a bratty, whiny teen, regardless of whatever amends she probably has made with John and Marlena.

ETA: No, it had to be later than '93; nevertheless, it's been a while.

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It has absolutely always shaped her, even in the years when I could swear she had made peace with John. This is something AMC did well with Kendall and Erica around the same time, making them finally come to terms and become close; ironically, IIRC, it was done by Megan McTavish as one of her first acts when she returned to that show, just before raping Bianca (ugh). That bond remained between mother and daughter until the end of AMC, that's evolution.*

*(I suspect that if Pine Valley ever actually takes off on ABC primetime, they will absolutely reset Kendall and Erica to feuding family assuming SMG retook the role to maximize the drama. There are ways that is plausible to do for both characters, of course, but I still find it a bit cliche.)

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I would say it's something that ebbs and flows.  It's over and everything is fine and then Sami brings it back when she needs an excuse for something.  Or when John/Marlena tell her something she doesn't like (especially John).

It was clearly put to rest for awhile considering Sami named her child after John.

Same with her relationship with Belle.  It will be fine and then all of a sudden they hate each other. 

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Exactly - the Sheffer years, right? Johnny who I believe is named "John Roman DiMera." Christ, she named her son for John!

Given that, I don't even blame Sami wholly for it at this point. I blame the writers for going back to the well when the characters had finally begun to move on. You can still have Sami clash with John and Marlena without pretending the love is not there.

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Yes, I've said this before, but as @carolineg has also pointed out, Sami (and Eric) had little time to bond with Roman before he "died."  If anyone had reason to "hate" John and remain loyal to Roman and Roman/Marlena, it was Carrie, because she was actually there to experience the two of them together.  Yet, for reasons that remain a legit mystery to me, JER chose to write it the other way around.  It's madness.

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Yes I think. To be fair though I think John was presumed dead at the time, so it was a bit of a pity naming lol

I would say Sami first got over the John/Marlena issues around her execution trial in 99.  She was fine at their wedding.  And it just was on and off over the years, but overall I don't think she's hated John in years.  I think it really is Sami's go to excuse when her back is against the wall and she just automatically lashes out at them when she doesn't like what she hearing.  But I also think John/Marlena do coddle her and allow it out of guilt even though Sami is literally the only one who cares about the affair still.

Yes!! Carrie actually lived the most trauma through that because she was old enough to remember.  But JER made Sami/Eric the ones obsessed with Roman/Marlena getting back together.  But on the other hand, perhaps Carrie had a clearer view on John/Marlena's relationship and love because she was older and knew it wasn't "fake" the way realRoman thought it was and perhaps Sami/Eric did as well.

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Or maybe JER just didn't give a [!@#$%^&*].

But did they know about Uncle Eric molesting Kimberly when they named the twins?  See, that's the difference.  If they named their son after Roman's uncle without knowing the truth about him, then you can't fault them.  But Sami was born years after Samantha had switched places with Marlena.  If I had been in Marlena's shoes, I don't believe I would've been as forgiving toward her afterwards, and I certainly wouldn't have named my child after her either, lol.

Agree.

Also agree.

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JER probably didn't give a [!@#$%^&*], but if I can at least give Carrie some sound motivation in my mind I'll allow it lol.  

No, Marlena/Roman did not know about the molestation when they named Eric.  There are some really weird scenes at Roman's funeral/wake where Kim won't even call Baby Eric-Eric because it triggers her.  So that's fine.  Just bad luck on that naming.  

The whole Marlena/Sam stuff was all forgiven way too easily by Marlena.  It was all good not even a year later.  Marlena has a really bad habit of overcompensating and placating bad acts of others out of her own guilt.  So, no, I would not have named my child after my twin after all that, but by the time Sam died her and Marlena were very close.  And Marlena took Sam's death really hard and blamed herself, so I can see it being something Marlena and Roman would want to do. 

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