Y&R: Week of May 04, 2009

[YRBB]

Now, Sven was a little bitch, that I could totally see!

So, a presumed dead man comes back to life as a vengeful woman? Perfect.

[Bright Eyes]

Well since Y&R went gay, maybe they're going transgendered too!

[Khan]

More than that, there really was a "Mary Jane Benson" whom Jack dated during his playboy days (but who he doesn't recall); but Shawn Garrett killed her and assumed her identity, post-gender reassignment surgery. So, Victor wouldn't have known that MJ wasn't really MJ, and that the real target of faux-MJ's anger was Paul (and by extension, Nikki)! He was only using MJ's connection to Jack to get back into town. But...wouldn't it be weird if Shawn-as-MJ actually fell for Jack, and vice-versa?

[YRBB]

Yeah, but we're assuming Shawn is all woman now!

Ah, the plot thickens! Yes, I can totally see this happening. Victor played for a fool, Paul and Nikki in mortal danger, and Jack falling in love with a guy in a woman's body. MJ would definitely try to resist Jack's charms, but then Jack will grown his hair long again and do that hair swoooosh/wave he used to do, so MJ will not be able to resist any longer!

[Khan]

JER would be so proud.

[Khan]

Right. No woman (or man pretending to be one) can resist Jack Abbott's patented surfer bang.

[YRBB]

He would so be, bless him. What is more, I think that Jack could discover remaining hints of Shawn's genitalia after a few nights of passionate sex... Covering herself, MJ will lie that it's two different tumors and will have them completely removed by a fake doctor who will get paid to lie. Naturally, the doctor, Dr. Osumakimati (for diversity, you see) will then start blackmailing Mary Shawn and it will all lead to terrible murder and Jack going to prison for a crime he didn't committ... only to find himself as Victor's biatch, who is once again in jail because of a crime he didn't committ. Or did he?

Exactly! I think that should be a two-week beat in the story: MJ's fascination with Jack's perfectly coiffed, shampoo smelling hair. A whole new dynamic in their (already sick) relationship!

[Cashton]

Of course we're friends!

I promise to never call you the 'C' word ever again! It's sad how many times I've had to promise people not to call them the 'C' word. The 'C' word is horrible and demeaning. Hehe...

[Khan]

Actually, the doctor's name is Kennedy, and he's played by Pat Harrington, Jr. (aka "Schneider", from One Day at a Time)

Oh, and as for Ashley's gaslighting? That's Gina Roma. [A] Nobody eats at her restaurant anymore, leaving her w/ too much free time; and She's sick and tired of Victor chasing every other skirt in town while she sits at home, alone.

I, for one, cannot wait for the sequence when she kidnaps Victor, locks him up in the wine cellar underneath his basement, and serenades him w/ "(The Theme from) The Rose" over and over again.

[YRBB]

I see!

[Khan]

And the dude whom Paul and Nikki learn was the original prison doctor who performed the gender-reassignment surgery? Lyle Waggoner, from "The Carol Burnett Show".

[YRBB]

Yes! Gina! How stupid of me not to realize! She has all the motive in the world!

This is the stuff Emmy wins are made off!

It's a whole world of interrelated characters out there and Paul learns that in the harshest way possible!

Naturally, Gina will soon realize that this torture of Victor is not enough, so she will get all Danny videos and songs and play them on a loop too. It will all end in Victor having sex fantasies with Danny.

[Khan]

Do I smell "November Sweeps"?

[Y&RWorldTurner]

Everyday is sweeps when you have YRBB and Khan as Co-HW's of a soap...

[YRBB]

Ding Ding Ding! It will all climax during a Danny apparition that impregnates Victor, who didn't know he could bear children... and on to more drama until February!