Faulkner

Naked Wasted, as horrible as it was, happened at a time when reality TV was still the Wild Wild West (2009, a lifetime ago in Bravo years) and televised cruelty was “in.” Obviously even then it was a huge violation, and I’m sure producers know that more skeletons will fall out of the closet if they push too much. Kenya seems like someone who knows where the bodies are buried. What a bed they’ve made, Bravo Bravo f*cking Bravo. The irony is that they might be forced to do more of the “cultural programming” (albeit Bravofied with more drama and glamour) that was the cable network’s original mission. They really made a mess of Below Deck, which was the biggest franchise on the network a few years ago. I heard Top Chef had a strong season without Padme, but it didn’t really resonate beyond its fandom. Project Runway feels as good as “dead,” even though it’s still technically running. No one cares anymore.

The Mike Manning workout:

Soaps are ensembles. But you see how often soaps hedge their bets with young characters to the point they’re ciphers. They are experiments that they seem to know will fail. They hire cheap, green actors and let them flail around in the hopes they’ll improve or write them off/do emergency recasts. Sometimes several emergency recasts. DAYS and GH actually try to develop fully formed, fleshed-out young characters, but their stories let them down, the characterizations either feel self-conscious to the point of parody (making a character a representative for “today’s teen” instead of simply a person) or hopelessly outdated (as if the writers never met a young person since they were young themselves), and the casting is very hit-or-miss. Young characters on the Bell soaps often feel underwritten to the point of nothingness. It’s basically “we need a hot hunk” or “CBS said we need some youth” instead of having a well-shaped vision for the character. These characters have to find a purpose beyond simply causing headaches for their parents and get integrated into the canvas. Connections with other adult characters and peers are essential. You can’t just have one or two young characters and think that’s gonna work unless they’re mixing it up with the adults. Any character’s success is almost wholly dependent on the charisma and personality the young performer brings to the role because they are getting bupkis in the scripts.

Kenya officially out according to TMZ:

I think she would be fire. Get Mark Teschner and Frank on the horn…

Damnit, I too was hoping to fully cut ties with this show, and he’s one of the people who’d at least make me tune in out of curiosity. But, yeah, this was one of those break-in-case-of-emergency hires.

B&B needs to cut their losses with the Spencer (kill Bill, ahem, or just send him over to Genoa City/figure out a way to make Brad alive if the Bells want to stay in the Don Diamont business—Victoria needs him), ditch Liam (hello, Dylan Quartermaine) and Katie (let HT focus on directing or perhaps producing), and start rebuilding the younger Forresters, with some satellite characters around them. I’d even start phasing out Eric, Thomas, and/or Hope for a bit in the hopes of getting a couple of unrelated new characters for potential love interests. This is just pie in the sky, of course. I get the sense Bradley loves keeping certain friends on the payroll, even if they contribute nothing to the show (HT).

For some reason, I thought he had passed already. Maybe I’m confusing him with someone else. Hmmm. That song was ubiquitous and 49 is far too young, even if he clearly lived his life on the edge.

I saw it on Instagram! Not sure I love the suit but he looks good anyway.

These shows feel like they don’t have aaaany money. I wonder how low the license fees got. B&B has never felt so insular as it has in recent years. How much are they really making from overseas markets? It feels like they don’t have the funds to expand the canvas much. Brad’s storytelling is so chaotic—there’s both this episodic feel, where stories are told with definite “beginnings” and “ends,” and leave very little impact on the characters; then there’s the Groundhog Day-level repetition, in which I swear old scripts are dusted off and reused, and other “stories” feeling interminable (whatever they’re doing with Sheila). While B&B is sorely lacking diversity, and Asian Americans have been woefully underrepresented in daytime, the “investment” Brad is making with Poppy and Luna feels typically one-dimensional and certainly could have been used to shore up other parts of the canvas. Especially if Brad intends to keep Sheila around. She’s long overstayed her welcome indeed. Having more of her family would humanize her and ground Finn in the canvas more. If they’re gonna keep Sheila, just bite the bullet and go all in, instead of this very unsatisfying, scattershot approach. Re: Victor—that character has been rode hard and put away wet. He’s been a cartoon for years. Yet, some very vocal people love the cartoon, and EB has demurred when they’ve tried to push him out of his rut. Sonny on GH feels the same way. People are already bitching about Sonny being a town pariah and feuding with Jason, which is the first time he’s been that interesting as “Sonny” in a very long time. No one wants to push them into new dynamics, and, for viewers who desire more than ambient TV, that’s deadly. Just spin them off into their own superhero series if that’s what you want. Some of us want to watch a soap opera.

Je t’aime, oui, je t’aime…

I wonder about the costs of having EB, MTS, et al., on the canvas. I thought maybe MTS was becoming expendable for a while. The Jordan story is the first time Nikki has been center stage in years. Was it worth it having Nikki flounce around Genoa City as the new “grande dame,” making idle threats against various characters on behalf of Newman? I don’t think so. The balance is way off on this show. It’s either feast or famine. Y&R has a real problem with managing its budget (clear to anyone who’s watched in recent years—it looks cheap), and having such a top-heavy cast of worn-out characters doesn’t help. But Eric Braeden and even MTS bring such cultural heft from their 45 years on the show. (When EB talks [!@#$%^&*] on Twitter, it often trends. We know how hard it is to cut through the noise.) They were soap stars when that meant something. But they’re also albatrosses around the show’s neck from a creative standpoint.

I was thinking about her flirtation with the seemingly blue-collar Chris Stamp, but even he was revealed to be an attorney and spy. And you make a good point about her “daddy issues”—this was a character who had been thoroughly thought through. It’s a reason why she was so iconic. Also why people were so put off with her dalliance with the likes of Ryan Lavery. It struck a dissonant chord. (I didn’t mind her taking advantage of a little younger totty as long as it wasn’t sold as some great love affair.) There’s a reason why I only enjoyed him with Hope. She appeared vulnerable but had a ramrod composure of steel. I’m becoming more and more appreciative of what Signy Coleman achieved in that role, and it’s sad that they undermined her legacy with all of the Adam bullsh!t. Lady loved to sh!t where she eats. Correct me if I’m wrong, as I didn’t watch GH in the ‘80s except via YouTube, but it’s funny that Alan didn’t appear to rack up such a body count (although the affairs he did have were major and consequential—like Susan Moore and Lucy).