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The MOST OFFENSIVE Comedienne Ever!


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Lisa Lampanelli



Somehow, she manages to offend virtually EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the room.

"We've got a drag queen, a pervert and a drug addict... and I'm only talking about Andy Dick. What a fruity bastard! I'm not saying Andy Dick is gay, but I will say he's been known to guess the flavor of a popsicle just by sitting on it. But don't get me wrong, I love gay guys... if it wasn't for fags, us fat chicks would have no friends. But enough about that pickle kisser!"

"Courtney Love. What a legend. Courtney Love's hand was called Hole. Not 'whole' as in complete. But Hole... as in dirty, stinky !@#$%^&*]. What a whore Courtney is. She would suck a dick for a Diet Coke. Don't worry, honey... I do it just for the taste of it."

"I love the black men. I'm a white girl with a big ass. I've had more black dick in me than a urinal at the Apollo. I've banged so many black buys, I'M getting ashy."

"Eddie Griffin and Dennis Rodman. The only two blacks here. I understand why Comedy Central only had two of you here... anymore and there'd be a shooting. But enough about the coloreds!"

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I am absolutely shocked and MORTIFIED by this clip.

And roasts.

I mean, who wants to be made fun of non-stop? And to have heinous, rude, crude insults hurled their way? Who wants to be a part of that?

I'm so shocked by this.

It was funny -- oh, heck yeah -- but it was politically incorrect and highly rude.

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OH..MY..GOD. I'm searching YouTube for all the vids with this chick. Vulgar, vulgar, vulgar. OH MY GOD.

I would seriously worry about my personal safety if I were this woman. My gosh. Everything I find, people are laughing while gritting their teeth, they're mouthing the "b" word, they're pretending to find something funny that really isn't. Seriously, this woman has guts. Wow. You're right, she really is the most offensive comedienne "EVER."

I'm so shocked right now.

And yet I'm searching for more of her.

Aack!

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This one is pretty damn crazy, too.

"I'd make out with you. Kiss me, you fat [!@#$%^&*]. I've always wanted to find out what Jerry Seinfeld's cock tastes like. Dude, what happened to your career? After Seinfeld, you couldn't buy a hit. I was nervous going tonight when I heard you were hosting. I thought the roast would be cancelled before they got to me. Oh, come on... jack-o-lanterns last longer in the fall than YOUR shows... but enough about this loser with a dream."

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Seriously, someone tell me if I'm screwed up in the head for finding every last bit of this ABSOLUTELY HYSTERICAL.

I can barely catch my breath over here, I'm laughing so hard! I'm literally gasping for breath.

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