Operation removes lightbulb from anus

Thu Jun 29, 7:34 AM ET

Dr. Aftab Ahmed reads an X-ray of prison inmate Fateh Mohammad at a hospital in Multan June 28, 2006. (Asim Tanveer/Reuters)

MULTAN, Pakistan (Reuters) - Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up last weekend with a glass lightbulb in his anus.

Wednesday night, doctors brought Mohammad's misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object.

"Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else," Mohammad, a grey-beared man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan.

"We had to take it out intact," said Dr. Farrukh Aftab at Nishtar Hospital. "Had it been broken inside, it would be a very very complicated situation."

Mohammad, who is serving a four-year sentence for making liquor, prohibited for Muslims, said he was shocked when he was first told the cause of his discomfort. He swears he didn't know the bulb was there.

"When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this," Mohammad said.

"I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners."

The doctor treating Mohammad said he'd never encountered anything like it before, and doubted the felon's story that someone had drugged him and inserted the bulb while he was comatose.

Talk about a "bright" idea.

All I can say, in my best Chandler Bing impression, is Oh, my GOD!!!!

All I can say, in my best Chandler Bing impression, is Oh, my GOD!!!!

You mean Janice, right JSF?

Could he BE any more stupid? (that is a Chandler reference).

You mean Janice, right JSF?

Keith, no.

Actually, I was mimicking Chandler MIMICKING Janice. Remember that ep? He said, "Oh, my GOD!"

Could he BE any more stupid? (that is a Chandler reference).

While true, he also said, "Oh, my GOD!"

You boys need to rewatch your "Friends" DVDs!

True, Chandler said it a couple of times, but Friends fans identify that phrase with Janice.

True, Chandler said it a couple of times, but Friends fans identify that phrase with Janice.

Perhaps, but notice I didn't say I was mimicking Chandler's catchphrase; I just said I was mimicking Chandler saying "Oh, my GOD!" .. Geez, I can't believe this has caused such controversy!!

Perhaps, but notice I didn't say I was mimicking Chandler's catchphrase; I just said I was mimicking Chandler saying "Oh, my GOD!" .. Geez, I can't believe this has caused such controversy!!

But you said it was a Chandler impression, that's why people corrected you.

I take my Friends seriously. LOL

But you said it was a Chandler impression, that's why people corrected you.

I take my Friends seriously. LOL

Aye, aye, aye, semantics! But due to a poor choice of words, I'll concede I lost this round.

That said, I just read this topic in-depth. And um, am I the only one who would TOTALLY wake up if I felt someone jamming a LIGHT BULB um...there? And another thing: it didn't shatter?! And would it? Obviously, I've never done...that...before. But this whole thing just shocks me. And I have to wonder about questions like these.

How can you not feel someone sticking a lightbulb in your ass?!

How can you not feel someone sticking a lightbulb in your ass?!

So we're agreed. This man is totally lying about not knowing how it got there.

Second questions: how does one get PLEASURE from a GLASS LIGHT BULB?!!