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The Oscars


Soapsuds

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You know what would be sorta awesome? Having the other judges from "The Voice" sitting in their chairs with their backs turned while Adam Levine performs right now.

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And the corny jokes he has to tell ain't helpin'.

It's the Oscars, and yet I feel as if all the graphics and animated sequences were inspired from some late '90's show on HBO.

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I wish there were a graceful way to change hosts right now....

You know what? Screw the graceful part. Just change now.

If there is one thing Nicole Kidman (presenting with Chewy Chocolate Petit Four...or whatever his name is) knows only too well about, it's being "12 Years a Slave." Am I right, Tom Cruise/Scientology haters?

That guy who won just beat the orchestra playing him off. WTG, dude. If it starts a trend and this thing runs until midnight, we'll know who to blame.

And will someone please get Shirley MacLaine a [!@#$%^&*] pair of glasses? For the love of God!

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