Ryan (song)

This is a parody of the song "Maria" from The Sound of Music. Enjoy!

He climbs a weenie and scrapes his knee

His dress he likes to wear

He waltzes on out of the competition

And whistles in the lair

And underneath his three bre@st shaped dimple

He has curlers in his hair

I even heard him singing in the mental hospital

He's always late for medication

and his penitence is never real

He's always late for everything

Except for every germ infested meal

I am glad to have to say it

But I definitely and superbly feel

Ryan's definitely an asset to the hospital

I'd like to say a word in his behalf

Ryan. because of his stupidity, makes me laugh

How do you solve a problem like Ryan?

How do you catch an idiot and kill it?

How do you find a word that means Stupid Ryan?

A Dynamite Kiddo! A whippity dock! A gun hit!

Many an insult you know you'd like to tell him

Many a thing he ought to understand

But how do you not make him stay

And listen to you say go away

How do you keep an a$$ out of the band

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Ryan?

How do you hold a gun to shoot him in your hand?

When I'm with him I'm definitely confused

Out of focus and not amused

And I never know exactly who I am

Predictable as leather

He's as useless as a feather

He's a dope! He's not a God! He's a moron!

He would annoy and outpester any pest

Scare a bird with bug eyes from its nest

He could throw Roseanne into a whirl

He is lazy! He is riled!

He is pasty! He is a child!

He is a headache! He is Satan!

He is like a girl!

How do you solve a problem like Ryan?

How do you catch an idiot and kill it?

How do you find a word that means Stupid Ryan?

A Dynamite Kiddo! A whippity dock! A gun hit!

Many an insult you know you'd like to tell him

Many a thing he ought to understand

But how do you not make him stay

And listen to you say go away

How do you keep an a$$ out of the band

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Ryan?

How do you hold a gun to shoot him in your hand?

Today was lame, save the Erica/Jack scenes.

We got that song and the credits again at the end...haha. Good thing I really like that song, or I'd be crying "Enough!".

I hate that apologies song now. Whats up with them playing the same song. Could they have at least played apologize by one republic, that applies to Jerica more that the other song.lol I loved jack finally getting a back bone, hopefully jerica will never reunite, they are awful for each other.

Now, after hearing it so much I can name that song in about 10 seconds, but I still do not like it.

Greenly is stupid. Her attempt to stack boxes was capitol L-A-M-E. I would have been outta that place in about an hour.

I continue to tell my roommate that they will be down there for about 3 weeks, at least.

Having that song air a FOURTH time in 2 weeks is RIDICULOUS (add the Desp Housewives airing and I'm even more annoyed) UGH Jesus.

I liked the Erica scnee sa lot--funny to compare to some of her breakup scenes from 20-30 years back (her denying the birth control pills to Tom in 79?) and you see she's still the same character at heart