See I heard from a friend of a friend who's sister is an editor at a magazine whose secretary goes to her sisters hair stylist that a certain person is threatened by the hotness of a certain other cast member.

In response to 12 women with barbie doll issues and misplaced sexual frustration, the entire writing staff and have been ordered by days to officially turn down the hotness in order to nip the problem in the bud.

From now on, no actors over 5'9'' will be hired.

No one will be allowed to be shirtless except insipid teenagers, who everyone depises anyway, in any one episode.

Steven Nichols and Drake Hogestyn will be issued standard old man paunches and be required to slouch whenever they are on-screen.

No foreign acents will be allowed, except for perhaps Mandarin, or bad German(think Rolf, not Victor Newman).

Married couples will be sexlesss , TOUNGE-less, and will get screen time only to deal with their childrens birth control or bicker about routine domestic issues.

When faced with bad dialouge or resistant females, men can and will be encouraged to yell LOUDER in order for the message to get through.

Through these specific measures, the show hopes to improve ratings and mollify its constituency. God Forbid that the show could be anything but the valid moral compass of family drama that is the staple of all daytime dramas!

OK..LMAO...I have officiallylost my mind to the sopa opera boards!

Edited June 17, 200718 yr by simisweet

No actors over 5'9? That doesnt sound believable. So then DAYS would only hire short actors from now on?

Edited June 18, 200718 yr by Rudolpho Meradi

Lol, as soon as you said "no actors over 5'9"" I knew you were joking. Good job

:lol:

Good job! I completely believe it

Hilarious.

Don't give them any ideas!

Very funny. You almost had me until I got to the no shirtless guys part.

Funny

Good post.