Cat

I can't believe Kandi gets more than Phaedra TBH.

I absolutely agree -- but Vicki is letting her daughter dictate the rules to her. Perhaps she needs to shoulder some of the responsibility in being left in this predicament? Perhaps she lets Brianna get away with it because deep down she knows Brooks is prob a crook but she is afraid of being alone (which is also why Brianna and her baby are living with her in the first place). Maybe Brianna would back off if she knew that Vicki's business assets were all tied up legally and no way could Brooks touch them, even if he married Vicki.

ETA: I just realized that when the fall-out from Vicki & Brooks' tragic relationship happens (and it WILL happen, trust me), Brooks will no doubt sue Vicki for all the proceeds from Vicki's Vodka because Big Mouth went on TV and said that VV could never have happened without Crooks. This is a Judge Judy episode waiting to happen.

First of all, Closet Confessions is the business. I haven't seen her latest yet, but I literally LOLed last week when she said "That little bitch, Richie -- what a dick he is." Secondly, while I do think Brianna is using her baby to keep Brooks out of the house, I don't think she is a bitch for wanting the best for her mother. She senses that Brooks is a conman after Vicki for only one thing -- money. Let's be honest, don't we ALL sense that Brooks is slimey and no-good? Vicki is at fault here because she wants to have her cake and eat it, too. She agreed to Briana, Ryan and Troy living with her because she wants to be close to her child and grandchild. I don't blame her for that. But she's also pretending not to date Brooks when she plainly is when her daughter's back is turned. She is like a lust-crazed teenager with a Romeo & Juliet complex who thinks the world is against her and her Greatest Love of All Time. It just makes her want that balding layabout even more. And defending his cheating ways ("We were on a break; he's a good man") makes her look even more ridiculous. Brianna has the best of intentions -- she just wants her mom to buy a clue before Brooks robs her blind of her hard-earned cash. I found it VERY telling that in the recent Vicki's Vodka lawsuit between Vicki and her business partner Robert (the guy in Monday's episode who came up with the Piggy Mary name), they finally talked it all out and he dropped her as a defendant in the suit. However, he did NOT drop Brooks as a defendant (Vicki gave Brooks 16% of the company). Fishy.

It's not just filler, is it? That jawline is pulled SO harshly up to her ear, Joan Rivers-style, that I have to wonder if she didn't have a face-lift.

Damn Gretchen. That is some jawline tuck/lip injections you got going there!

I'm not sure I am 100% on Team Kathy but I will admit that her line about not getting her new nose broke during the fight was funny. TBH, Kathy is so over the Melissa-Teresa shenanigans and her oil slick of a husband that it is almost "not minding by default."

I'm missing one then... I thought it was Skinny Italian, then the Fabulicious family one with her mom and Gia on the cover, and then the grilling cookbook.

The pics don't show it but Teresa was truly sobbing and not Hollywood-crying like we have seen some of the other HWs do (naming no names). And Joe was kissing her on the cheek the way I would kiss my brother, probably, if we'd just had a traumatic moment in our lives. It felt like an authentic moment and not just making up for the sake of the cameras. I don't know who Dr. V is but i liked her right away. She is very pretty and plus she's Italian. If whatever other reality shows aren't working out for her, she needs to move to NJ and Andy Cohen needs to make that happen! I'd love to see her assessment of Jacqueline. And Danielle Staub, LOL. Melissa trashing Teresa's endorsements and products was full-on envy talking. Teresa has moved on from promoting her local tanning salon back in Season 1 to publishing three NYT-bestselling cookbooks with a reputable publishing house (with more undoubtedly on the way), Fabellini and the hair-care line. You can't say that Teresa isn't working hard to make these opportunities happen for her. Unlike Miss Entitled who bitches about her over-mortgaged fake home not selling and feels she is owed a sparkling career in the spotlight all because she is Teresa's SIL. BTW, I've noticed they aren't pimping Melissa's mega singing career AT ALL this season. Is it because she's focusing all her energies on her "advice" book? The one that is being ghostwritten for her?

LMAO! That black tar that got all over everybody during the fight? Is what Joe Gorga uses to spraypaint his bald patch! At least Joe owned up to it. Dr. V needs to join RHoNJ as a HW. She would fit in perfectly and has a definite Dina look about her. Rich is such a little punk-ass bitch. And my hatred of Melissa knows no bounds. What a manipulator. She actively turns people against her SIL in order to divide and conquer and come out the Queen Bee. She blames Teresa and "her friends" for spreading all these "lies" about her? Bitch, it was your BFF and former bridesmaid Jan who is spilling all your dirty secrets to the world! I don't know what to say about that hell o' awkward bath-tub scene between Teresa and Joe Guidice in the middle of all this mess. WTF? Some sexy-times talk I really don't need to hear. That poor waiter didn't know where to look when he came in with the champagne. Also: brown chicka brown chow, Teresa? I really liked Rosie the last few episodes. She actively wants to work things out. Plus she's really the only cousin that everybody gets along with.

Porsha looks better with short hair than long. More sophisticated and less like a little girl playing dress-up. Cynthia is by far the best in all these pictures. Cynthia knows exactly what suits her. Judging from the photos, she's also had a little filler and botox work done, on her forehead and perhaps on her lips. Nene, sigh. It's not the "ashy" feet (I don't get the whole ashy thing -- her feet don't look excessively dry to me), it the piss-poor hemming on those white pants! She literally pinned them up 2 seconds before she walked in there, and it shows. And they are about to drop, too. I am so surprised about this because ever since Nene got her teeth fixed and an A-list stylist, she now dresses like the star she is. Flattering dresses that are perfect for her shape and show off her long legs; amazing accessories; movie star make-up. This is a rare slip-up from her because she always looks on point. The others? Mutton dressed as lamb.

I CAN'T with MeMeMelissa and Joey blaming Teresa and Joe Giudice for this mess. Um, was it not Gorga who called Teresa 'scum'? Was it not Gorga who charged at Joe (and was still deflected to the ground by his BIL like a pesky fly)? Was it not Melissa who scratched up Giudice's face? The only question I have is, why did Teresa run out of there? Why didn't she be her husband and brother to stop? She looked cowardly running away from the situation. As far as I can see, the wedge between Joey and his family came about less because of Joe Giudice and more because Melissa and Joey told Bravo they would sell out Teresa if they got given a part on the show. That's shady any way you cut it. Re: Milania Hair Care, I was ready to laugh at that stuff, but her shampoo and conditioner is sulphate- and paraben-free so kudos to her for investing in an environmentally-friendly, non-harsh hair product.

Surely you mean "Eh-zack-ly" ?! Another one: "indiscrepancies." Which apparently means indiscreshins indiscretions.

Oh, and BTW, Tamra: This classy picture of you doing a squat-and-drop is going to follow you to your grave.

ALL the OC women are "ironic" [© Vicki] and try to "personify" [© Gretchen] all their worst faults on each other. The OC women (with a few exceptions) also have little clue how to speak English. So why do they pretend all the time that everything in their life is perfect and hunky-dory and then get upset when they are called out on it? Why do they try and get dirt on each other when they know that the other person knows where all the bodies are buried? It's ridiculous. And I LOVE IT. Let the rampant stupidity and bitchy reveals continue! I hope Lauri gets an orange next season. Revenge is a dish best eaten cold, and Lauri is positively icy as she calmly repeats again and again what she saw all those years ago. Vicki gets more and more aggressive when she gets backed into a corner, and it makes her look guilty of whatever it is she is rumored to have done at some insurance convention back in Dubya's presidency. I loved how Lauri's eyes narrowed in her best Evil Bitch look when she lightly said that this was payback for Vicki relaying gossip about her and her husband to Jeana. I need Jeana to return to the show and CONFIRM all this. So -- I think we can safely say that Lauri is a bitch not to be crossed with a shitty-but-rich husband, Vicki and Gretchen are both lying liars who lie (and the face-lift Gretchen claims she never had was looking particularly harsh in Monday's episode), and Tamra and Lydia are just going to sit back and enjoy the show. I like Alexis's new hair but really, does this ho add anything to the show? Begone to look after your "trampoline park empire" and let's get Jeanna back in here with her kids.

I think Melissa is so focused on fame and trumping Teresa at this point (I honestly do believe she feels 'entitled' to have the fame that Teresa has) that it would take Andy Cohen showing her a home-made DVD (provided by Jan, of course) of Melissa blowing, like, bin Laden for her to pull the "I'm gonna focus on my family" card.

Jacqueline is not a bad mom, but I do think she is struggling with major depression issues. Her reactions seem to swing from hyperactive obsession with Teresa and Twitter, to happiness, to sadness. She reminds me of somebody I know who used to be on anti-depressants. I worry that the show may push her to breaking-point sometimes -- but that has nothing to do with Nicholas. I think the producers and camerapeople have been going to Jacq's house for so many years now, Nicholas has grown up with them being in his home, and I am sure they are respectful of him and his autism when filming. Re: Sunday's episode, I think it is clear now what awful people Melissa and Joe are. No wonder they hired a massive trailer to get to Lake George -- so that Melissa's outsize ego could fit inside. When Miss Thang isn't lecturing everybody about how to keep their husband happy (if I were her mom, I would have decked her for suggesting that Mommy didn't work hard enough to keep Daddy's cheating ass at home), then Miss Victim is playing the Woe-is-Me card. Her deluded ass truly thinks she is the star of the show, and she was sabotaging the Lake George session from the moment she packed her bags for it. She has clearly studied Teresa and knows all her failings. Teresa's Achilles heel is her inability to admit she is wrong about ANYTHING. That's why she harped on and on and ON about Jacqueline not being there. Because Jacqueline is the "cause" of all her problems with her family? The [!@#$%^&*]? I am on Team Teresa but that is just plainly untrue. I'm surprised Bravo still won't air the reason the Gorgas and the Giudices fell out -- because Melissa and Kathy promised to tear down Teresa and reveal all her her deep, dark secrets if they got spots on the show. IOW, they sold out family. Teresa was foolish not to bring up the hurt she felt over that but she should also admit that she has been out ever since to bismirch Melissa's reputation in retaliation. Melissa obviously practiced her begging scene in front of the mirror. It was almost funny how little attention Teresa did not want to pay to that melodramatic fool clasping her leg. I have been waiting for the two Joes to bitch-slap it out for a long time now. Giudice was in the right here -- Gorga came at him like Ramona Singer coming after a giant glass of Pinot. The two idiots running this 'healing session' are either actors or they know that this family is fucked so why even bother? At this point, everybody just needs to have a giant fistfight so they get it all out of their systems.

Just watched RHoOC. Why did Heather Heather fly up to Canada for 6 hours?! Ridiculous. Vicki reacted as I expected. Gretchen handled herself well, considering she had Vicki in Cujo mode, foghorning into her face. But she and Vicki are as bad as each other. They both cheated when they were with their respective partners, and both have used a ton of vague words and legalisms to avoid coming right out and saying it one way or another. I liked Gretchen right up until the moment she refused to admit one way or another that she didn't cheat on Jeff. At least Vicki admitted she cheated on Don, although that was prob because her ass was boxed into a corner. Lauri is cool as a cucumber. This icy, smiling bitch needs to return as a full-time HW next season. For real. Tamra. [!@#$%^&*]-stirrer extraordinaire. I love Lydia. That is all. And her uncle is HOT.

You know Vicki went full Cujo on Lauri. I'm curious to see Gretchen call Heather a liar/disloyal and Heather to laugh in her face, TBH. I still have yet to see this week's episode... Am excited for it, though!

gasp. No way! Heather Dubrow is the single best new addition to the RH franchise in the past five years and has done wonders to shake up/rejuvenate RHoOC. I love me the vets but sometimes Bravo hits kismet with a newbie who adds a great new dynamic to the show. And so it is with Heather. Why not six HWs on RHoOC? Lydia is really growing on me but if she had to be cut for Jeanna, I would consider it. The only thing is, I don't think Jeanna would return, except perhaps in a recurring/one-off capacity. It's probably one of the things I like best about her. Jeanna pretty much lived her life in front of the cameras as it was. They caught the bad as well as the good in her life -- she never ducked from showing us shouting at her kids, or problems with her husband or her job. I sense that she pulled back from RHoOC when she realized fights and friendships were getting to be a little too manufactured for the cameras for dramatic effect and everybody was fronting like it was 2005. She probably just wanted to do her own thing in private, getting back on the dating scene after her divorce and growing her real estate career again.

RHoNJ: Well, at least this week's episode was better than last week's. Probably due to Princess Milania stealing the show. Seeing MeMeMelissa interacting with her mother and sisters last week and her GFs this week makes me realize just how much editing Bravo Rogue Producer did around Melissa's character to prop her ass the last two seasons. We saw ZERO of MeMe's sisters and girl friends last year and as a result, the self-produced image of Melissa was one of either the Plucky, Pretty SIL who was being victimised by jealous Teresa. Now that the Rogue Producer has been ejected, it is like we can finally see MeMe for the vainglorious, self-obsessed wannabe she is. The look her so-called BFFs gave her when she started talking about giving marital advice (particularly "You can cook and clean but you have to look good doing it") was pure ice. Kind of like the side-eyes her mom and sister were throwing her selfish ass last week. Sure, I think Teresa is definitely jealous and hates Melissa but she's got some reason to. And why the hell she is still on talking terms with Kathy after the things she said about Teresa's father at Reunion, I'll never know. Jeff Goldblum's gross, ugly brother continues to confirm what a douche he is, though to be fair, he lost me last season with the fish comment. I swear, that Joe x2 fight in the previews looks like two gorillas wrestling each other. LOL. Love the close-up on Lydia's teefs.

First of all, how have I missed this thread?! Started by DaytimeFan no less! Secondly, SFK, absolute word to everything you wrote. Joan lives the life she has always wanted to live (and one I have always dreamed of -- Monte Carlo, yachts, a house in Provence, another in Eaton Square. It's like the James Bond lifestyle but for fabulous divas). Not that it has been easy -- she has had to battle through husbands who abused her, slept around, developed terrible drug addictions and tried to rob her of her money. She worked on some major D-list shlockers in order to keep her kids in private school. Dynasty was a serendipitous accident, an opportunity she grasped with both hands. Because Joan loves life and loves living it. She is also a late bloomer, IMO -- she really came into her own in her 40s looks-wise and as television's premiere uberbitch on Dynasty (many have tried but nobody has succeeded in stealing her crown) and it was only in her late-60s that she finally married a sweet guy who seems to truly care for her. She deserves it. Oh, and true story -- my first ever job (well, internship) was at a literary agency where JC was one of the authors represented. JC had a burgeoning boinkbuster career in the 1990s. So Day 2, and I'm answering the phones. Joan calls and I recognize her voice immediately (I wasn't a Dynasty fan for nothing). She wants to speak to our head agent. I put her on hold with a "One moment please, Mrs. Collins." Unfortunately, Big Agent is on the phone so I get back to Joan on the line who is hissing and spitting, madder than a wet cat. I get an earful about addressing her as "Miss Collins" before she asks to be passed on to my colleague who also gets an earful. It's a wonder I didn't get fired that very day. But you know what? I'm not even sorry she yelled at me and it has not diminished my appreciation of her. The Great Joan Collins tore me a new a$$hole and that is how it should be. Miss Collins a megastar with a huge diva reputation to protect. It would have been rude of her not to get icy.

RHoOC: Finally caught this week's episode, I was so excited for it and wasn't disappointed. -Loving Lydia at the moment and her up-front way of calling things as she sees them, and not in a super-bitchy way. Calling Slade a little girl and pointing out that he has to put down the HWs to make himself feel better. I also like how genuinely supportive she is of the other women, including Gretchen. When the other ladies went IN on Gretch at dinner, Lydia held off. -Heather. And Terry. Love this couple. She is amazing. -Gretchen wearing her engagement ring that Jim gave her WTF? Ok, I understand why she'd wear it from time to time. Jim was a big part of her life, why discard the gifts he gave her even though she's in a new relationship? OTOH, an engagement ring has added significance above and beyond a simple piece of jewellery; I wonder if she wore it to make herself appear to be a "traditional" HW at the bridal boutique. -Tamra is literally a human Barbie doll in every single one of those dresses. I love how the HWs were telling her she looked like Barbie -- as a compliment -- and she was taking it as a compliment. Barbie, OC style icon. -Gretchen's face looked like an orangutan's smacked bottom when she saw Alexis. What did it matter? Alexis was leaving her alone and not paying any attention to her. -Not Jesus Jugs' biggest fan but she thanked Tamra in a classy way about defending her to Gretchen without completely tearing her down. -Lauri is so thirsty to get back on RHoOC. You know what? I think she just might swing it. Loved Vicki finally being told about Brooks although her defending her human turd of an ex and denying he had done anything wrong was truly sad to watch. Vicki is like Teresa on NJ, she'd rather die than lose face or admit a mistake or defeat. -Lauri not wanting to badmouth Gretchen when she wasn't there was rich considering she's been doing the same about Vicki with Gretchen and on her VTs. -Gretchen exposed! It actually felt rather good because Gretchen has been fronting about a lot of things for a while, just like she accused Alexis of doing last year. Now, when is Tamra going to get some HW comeuppance? Nobody ever calls her out on her [!@#$%^&*] and hurtful words. Next week: Another trip, hurrah! Vicki skies into a cameraman and goes full-rottweiler on Lauri!

We still have the better part of the current season to go, right?! I feel like this season just got started! I need a major Gretchen/Tamra falling out, a Gretch/Vicki fight, Vicki tearing Lauri a new one, Briana kicking Brooks out of the house or something, another ladies vacation (Woooo Hoooooooooooooooooooo!), a Jeana sighting and Heather commenting on the whole mess and giving Alexis the side-eye. Not to mention the hot tranny mess that MUST be Tamra Barney's wedding.

RHoNJ: Well, that's 41 minutes of my life I'll never get back. I had to laugh when MeMeMeMelissa told her mom that she was writing a book (well, a paragraph) about how to be a good wife and said she was going to talk about her father. She's all "Part of why I want to put him in the book is because I think it molds me into the wife I am, and I want to make it such an incredible environment for my husband when he's here that he doesn't want to look elsewhere when he's out." Way to indirectly lay the blame for your dad's cheating at your mom's feet, Melissa. What a self-obsessed, nasty piece of work she is. Her mom's upset face said it all. Rosie was acting like these little kids at the supermarket who throw MAJOR tantrums, screaming and throwing their bodies all over the floor, and their mother is absolutely mortified. I can't wait to watch RHoOC. Seriously. I loved last week's two-hour special, too.