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extremely likeable man will be talking to you.

Perhaps it's that likeability that has made Ed, who stars in the role of Bill Horton on NBC's weekday serial, Days of Our Lives, and his wife, actress Joyce Bulifant, one of Hollywood's favorite couples.

And it's also probably been responsible for all those "perfect couple" magazine articles Ed refers to. "I read about us in those articles," Ed says, "about the perfect couple that live on this farm that sounds like Camelot. I feel they are misrepresentations. I'd hate for someone to read them and say 'why can't that be me?' Because even though life is often painted like an old MGM movie, we all should know it's really not like that.'

The temptation to exaggerate the degree of Ed's marital bliss might also be the result of the memories of those who have known him for awhile. They remember their concern for the couple's future when he and Joyce were pronounced man and wife in the yard of their farmhouse home at the mouth of a large canyon in California's San Fernando Valley.

Just about a year-and-a-half earlier, Ed had been divorced from his first wife, Pamela, to whom he'd been married for two years. He was an impulsive, somewhat impatient individual, heavily engrossed in all phases of his craft. He was president (and still is) of Theatre East, a theatre workshop comprised mainly of actors, writers and directors who formerly worked in New York, and he was continuously involved in other related projects in addition to his role on Days.

And Ed was getting more than a wife. Joyce had been married to James MacArthur (of Hawaii Five-O) and had two children who would be living with them. There appeared to be a lot of radical changes ahead for him.

The failure of his first marriage did not worry Ed. "I was a different person then," he says. "I wasn't ready, and I really hadn't found out who I was. It was like being just on the outskirts of reality. I felt that even though I was there, in that situation. I wouldn't always remain there."

Becoming a stepfather was more of a concern. I'm always afraid of being hurt," he says, again revealing the frailty of man that mixes with the strength. "i'm afraid that someone is going to withdraw from me, so I often won't give of myself outwardly as much as I'm really feeling inside.

"I wanted it to be a slow process of learning to live together, rather than saying 'kids, kids, love me, love me, I'm going to be like your dad.' Because among other things, they already had a father, and there's no reason for me to diminish whatever affection they feel for him."

It's worked. All of it. "I feel as if Joyce and I have always been married," says Ed. And in the same breath in which he speaks of the love and admiration he feels for his wife, he enthusiastically relates one of his latest projects. "I've just finished writing and directing an educational film called An Actor's Journey Into Celluloid. It takes a stage actor through the transition to film, and will go into release for high schools, colleges and drama schools all over the world. Next I'm helping produce a horror film, which will be a sophisticated satire."

"When we were married, a part of the ceremony included a quote that I believe to be very true," explains Ed. "It's the one that says that when you're married you're like pillars that support the temple. You should stand close together, but not TOO close, or the floor will fall in. That's a little alien to the Christian theory in which you are the mystical thing of 'oneism.' I believe you support the roof by being two distinct individuals." The roof is holding firm at the Mallory home.

"I'm not saying at MOMENTS you don't become one," Ed adds. "Life should be spontaneous. It can't be preconceived. That's the way our courtship was - romantic - moment to moment."

The natural way their relationship unfolded and grew is another clue to the reason why it's working. "After my first marriage, I wasn't considering whether I would or wouldn't marry again," Ed recalls. "I wasn't thinking about it at all."

"If you go into marriage with a preconceived traditional notion of what marriage should be, and you sit around and think, 'I'm not living up to the traditional aspects,' then you're going to be unhappy," he says.

A recent example: "Joyce is a sentimentalist," Ed notes. "But while I like to make a big thing of Christmas, I think it's nonsense that someone decrees who to give gifts. So this past Valentine's Day, I didn't give Joyce anything. I told her I'd give her a present when it's Valentine's Day to me. Of course, she's been asking if it's Valentine's Day ever since; but it didn't become a major marital crisis, even though I'd broken a tradition. She knows how I feel about her.

"If people are relaxed and not bound by formed notions of what their happiness should be, and they develop respect for one another, why shouldn't they be happy? Why shouldn't it work? You can seek forever if you're seeking the elusive conception of what you think love may be. You may be seeking the rest of your life."

Mutual respect and honesty prevails in their marriage. "I know Joyce is professionally talented," says Ed, "and I think she believes I am."

The result of that awareness has led to a proper amount of tolerance. "She understands if I react emotionally to something I'm working on, and I understand that she likes to flit around and get involved in a lot of various activities. There are no demands from either of us. If she says she wants to see a movie, I can say I don't want to go, and then she'll go. There's no need to cling." Since they share theatrical interests, many of Ed's creative projects involve Joyce, and they are not apart as much as it may seem.

Honesty, respect, admiration. As the terms are repeated in Ed Mallory's conversation, one begins to see clearly why he beat the odds against a successful marriage. And the marriage has something else going for it - the children.

On January 13, 1971, Edward John Mallory (he's called "John") was born to the Mallorys. "He's kind of brought all of us together as a family," claims Ed. "A second marriage is always a difficult problem with respect to the children, despite the fact that in our case it's always been amicable. Jim (James MacArthur) comes to the house with his wife, Melody, whenever they're in town, and Helen Hayes, who is the grandmother of the oldest children, comes to the house for dinner."

Charlie was nine and Mary was three when Ed married Joyce. "Charlie calls me 'Ed,' but refers to me as 'my dad' to his friends," says the actor. "The situation was easier on Mary, since she was so young. But whether I'm their real father or not, I'm John's father and they know he's their brother. It's been a rewarding experience, I still have doubts about some of the other things I do, but I know a part of the real me is in that house with Joyce and the kids."

- CHARLES SPRINGHEIM

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'Joyce and I are not the Perfect Couple' - true.They divorced in 74.

He then married onscreen daughter in law Suzanne Zenor (Margo)

Joyce went on to marry William Asher (who had been married to Elizabeth Montgomery).Interestingly,Asher adopted Mallory's son who was called John Mallory Asher.

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She did look very nice.

I guess these clips have made the rounds in various different sets (I know some were used on the show in flashbacks) but I'd never seen the ones with Susan Flannery before, so I'll post in case anyone else is in the same boat.

Edited by CarlD2
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Select firm, glossy fresh eggplants. Place them on a flat pan and broil in a preheated oven until the skin turns crisp and flaky and eggplant is soft, about 20 to 25 minutes. Cool slightly and peel off and discard skin. In a wooden chopping bowl, chop scallions, garlic, tomatoes fine. Add salt and pepper. Add eggplant. Chop fine, then beat with a wooden spoon to a puree. Add small amount of olive oil, a little at a time, and mix well. Place in glass or china bowl. The oil will rise to the surface. Drain and chill several hours so that flavors will mingle. The eggplant should be of pate consistency. Before serving, drain again to remove surplus olive oil and eggplant juice. Garnish bowl with strips of tomatoes and green peppers if desired. Some cooks like to add two medium green peppers, cleaned and minced, and increase garlic to three cloves. One tablespoon of lemon juice or red win vinegar may also be added. Serves six to eight.

According to Stanley, corn meal of Mamaliga, for centuries the national dish in Rumania, is as popular as bread or potatoes are in America. Quite simply it is yellow corn meal mush. Mamaliga is cooked and enjoyed in various ways. Stanley frequently serves it as a side dish with meat-stuffed cabbage leaves called Sarmale. As a thick corn meal mush, it is eaten by itself with cheese, meat stews, and vegetables. Sometimes it is baked with layers of mild brick or strong goat cheese and topped with sour cream. Use coarse stone-ground yellow corn meal which can be found in health-food shops and some grocery stores.

MAMALIGA

(Yellow corn meal msh)

1 cup stone-ground yellow corn meal

1 tsp. salt

1 tbsps. butter

Stir corn meal into one cup of cold water. Bring three cups of water to a boil in a heavy-bottomed two quart saucepan, and add salt. Gradually porn corn meal mixture into boiling water, stirring constantly until it starts to bubble. Cover partially and simmer eight to ten minutes, stirring occasionally. Add more salt if necessary; mush tends to taste very flat if undersalted. Beat in butter and serve. Serves four.

An imaginative and creative gourmet cook, the young bachelor actor has devised a number of delicious and inexpensive vegetable casserole dishes. One, in particular - Broccoli Custard - has been widely published and is a welcome addition to recipe files. This reporter finds it a family favorite. "It is a delicious and satisfying meat substitute, doesn't cost much, and can be prepared in advance," commented Stanley. "Buy the freshest deep-green broccoli you can find. It's hard to give exact time for parboiling broccoli. Young, tender, stalks need about only three minutes, older ones, about five."

BROCCOLI CUSTARD

2 lbs. broccoli, cut in 2-inch pieces

4 eggs, beaten

2 cups creamed cottage cheese

1 (8-oz.) can whole kernel corn

1/3 cup green onion, chopped

1 cup shredded sharp Cheddar cheese

Dash hot pepper sauce

Salt and pepper to taste

1/4 cup butter or margarine

2/3 cup seasoned bread crumbs

Wash broccoli well. Cut into two-inch pieces and peel stems. Blanch in boiling salted water for three to five minutes. Place the broccoli in a greased 11x7x2-inch ovenproof casserole. Combine eggs and cottage cheese in large bowl and mix well. Add drained corn, onion, cheese, hot pepper sauce, salt. Melt butter and combine with the bread crumbs. Sprinkle over top of casserole and bake at 325 for 45 minutes. Cool five minutes before serving. Makes six to eight servings.

"I'm grateful to the Italians for introducing broccoli," Stanley admitted with a grin; "also for bringing us a marvelous braised veal shank dish with vegetables, Osso Buco. Formerly I used a recipe which called for every pot in the kitchen but now I've found a simpler one. However, it includes a long list of ingredients. This traditional Italian veal dish calls for veal shanks and is excellent for an informal dinner party. Would you believe that I paid $7.00 for enough veal shanks to feed four? I could scarcely believe the price since it is such a bony cut. Unless you shop in an Italian market, your meat man may not have veal shanks, but Osso Buco is so delectable that it is worth placing an order ahead of time or hunting a meat market that carries veal shanks - even at 7.00."

OSSO BUCO

2 tbsps. olive oil

2. tbsps. butter

8 slices veal shank, sawed into 3-inch thick slices

Flour for coating

1/2 tsp. salt

1/2 tsp. freshly ground pepper

1 medium carrot, chopped

2 onions, chopped

1 stalk celery with leaves, chopped

1/4 cup parsley, chopped

2 bay leaves, crumbled

1/2 tsp. each; rosemary, thyme, oregano

2 cloves garlic, chopped

1 cup dry white wine

1 heaping tbsp. tomato paste

2 large ripe tomatoes, peeled or 1 cup canned, peeled plum tomatoes, chopped

1 cup chicken broth

2 tbsps. grated lemon peel

For braising the shanks, a heavy-bottomed Dutch oven is ideal. Heat olive oil and butter in Dutch oven. Toss veal shanks in flour in bag and remove excess flour. Brown meat on both sides. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Mix tomato paste with wine and chicken broth and pour over meat. Add carrots, onions, bay leaves, celery, rosemary, thyme, oregano, garlic, and fresh or canned tomatoes. Stir well, and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to simmer for five minutes and then cover pot. Cook for about two hours, or until shanks are tender. Thirty minutes before meat is done, sprinkle lemon peel and parsley over meat. Makes six to eight servings. Stanley likes to serve his Italian specialty over that lovely, saffron-flavored Italian rice dish, Risotto. "Osso Buco," he continued, with the true excitement of the gourmet cook, "is a dish that always makes a big hit with men at an informal feast because they like the challenge of getting the meat off the bone and digging for the marrow inside. I spoon the rich sauce over the glazed meat and rice. With a tossed salad, warm Italian bread, a glass of Soave wine, and fruit for dessert, you have a culinary masterpiece."

Still a young man, Stanley Kamel has prepared many a culinary masterpiece for his friends. Although he has never enrolled in a cooking course, he is an avid cookbook collector and also saves family recipes and those from fellow actors who are fine cooks. A culinary experimenter, he invites gourmet friends for an evening of good eating and prepares everything himself, even home-baked bread if the menu calls for it. Parts of his international feasts may be prepared a few days ahead of the occasion.

"I plan to write a cookbook of favorite recipes I've collected on European travel," he commented, "but when I was a struggling young actor newly graduated from Boston University's School of Fine Arts I had no such ambition. Then I cooked strictly budget-style to still hunger pangs with very little money. So I seemed to live on an abundance of variations of pasta. It was cheap, filling, and fine for a while but, believe me, seven nights a week of spaghetti got to be mighty monotonous. For lunch between acting classes in New York I would wolf down a hot dog and doughnut. Unhappily, I knew nothing about healthful diet in those days."

The intelligent and articulate actor does now, however. We sat discussing these, and other topics, in Stanley's charming old rented Spanish house that clings to a narrow lane on a steep hillside overlooking Hollywood. It is a very private and romantic house completely enclosed by masses of fiery red bougainvillea, night-blooming jasmine, lemon, lime, and orange trees, a true Shangri-la.

"I'm a Capricorn, born January 1," he explained, "and we Caps love our homes and hate to leave them. Right now I have time off from Days of Our Lives and planned to leave Saturday for three weeks in London, where I have friends, and Paris. But I keep asking myself, 'Is this trip necessary?' I could spend my vacation lolling in my hammock, listening to music, sniffing the fragrance of the honeysuckle, making cooling drinks from my Rangpur limes, and watching my dogs Samantha (Sam) and Shana."

Those beloved dogs are almost human and Stanley demonstrated how they stand on their hind legs and answer his questions on cooking procedures. He spends his spare time helping stray animals, attending yoga classes ("It's total relaxation"), riding horseback ("I've always loved horses; I've been riding since I was four"), and playing strenuous games of squash.

Born in New Brunswick, New Jersey, Stanley attended Rutgers Prep School and graduated in 1965 from Boston University School of Fine and Applied Arts. "I never really studied anything but acting, never had a backup in case I didn't make it." Then he studied drama with famed theatrical coach Sandy Meisner, which led to a succession of off-Broadway roles and work in touring companies. Eventually he went to California, where he made numerous TV guest appearances in dozens of series. In January, 1972, he joined the cast of Days of Our Lives but still manages to fit in work on television shows like Kojak, Emergency, and Owen Marshall.

"Yoga and meditation have brought me serenity and peace of mind," he remarked. "Yet on TV I always seem to portray men who cry or die, highly emotional characters who are inevitably killed off before the final credits."

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