Glee: Discusion Thread

[MarkH]

Dear God in Heaven! The bon mots in last night's Glee. Also balanced out with the emotional moments (Will crying at the sight of his child, and his wife feeling remorse; the beautiful finale number where--maybe--Quinn realizes that Glee is more on her side than Sue).

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FIGGINS: Let’s hug it out. … This meeting won’t end until I see bodies touching. It’s a technique I learned in my leadership seminar last week.

WILL: I will destroy you.

SUE: I am about to vomit down your back.

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JACOB (what is his name?): The independent polling company in my Dockers has determined you’re the hottest girl in this school.

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SUE: Alright everybody, listen up. When you hear your name called, cross over to my side of this bright shiny thing….Santana,Wheels, Gay Kid, Asian, other Asian, Aretha, and Shaft.

KENDRA: I wanted to remind you to tell that <inaudible> not to vaccinate in the hospital. I’m pretty sure those shots made my kids stupid.

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SUE: Sometimes people ask me ‘Sue, how come you are so sensitive to minorities?’ I’ll tell you why: Because I know first hand how hard it is to struggle as a minority in America today. I’m 1/16th Comanche Indian. In fact, I like minorities so much, I’m thinkin’ about moving to California to become one!

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WILL: Sue. Hey Sylvester, I’m talkin’ to you!

SUE: Oh hey buddy. I thought I smelled failure!

WILL: You are deliberately undermining me in front of these kids

SUE: Your delusions of persecution are a sure sign of early-stage paranoid schizophrenia.

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WILL: That is it! It ends right here!

SUE: A cockfight! Fantastic!

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SUE: You want to get real? You’re right Will. I have been trying to destroy your club with a conviction I can only call religious. And you want to know why? Because I don’t trust a man with curly hair. I can’t help but picture small birds laying sulphurous eggs in there, and I find it disgusting!

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SUE (to reporter): Okay. Listen up. This is all your readers need to know. I’m all about empowerment. I empower my Cheerios to live in a constant state of fear by creating an environment of irrational, random terror.

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SUE: (after Cheerios flunked in Spanish). This is a disaster of international proportions…You can’t stand to see a woman in power. Your psychosexual derangement would be fascinating, Will, if it weren’t TERRIFYING!

FIGGINS: According to our test records, most of your Cheeerios are functionally illiterate.

SUE: Oh, so what.

FIGGINS: Only last Friday, at the football game, they tried to spell out “Go Team” and they finally spelled out “To Game”.

WILL: Since 1992, 95% of your Cheerios should have flunked Spanish. And I for one am not going to be a part of it anymore.

SUE: Oh, Will, we all know about your devotion to that dying language. Let me break this down for you. I empower my Cheerios to be champions. Do they go on to College? I don’t know, and I don’t care. Should they learn Spanish? Sure, if they want to become dishwashers and gardeners. But if they want to be bankers and lawyers and captains of industry, the most important lesson they could possibly learn is how to do a round-off.

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KURT: She even told me if I talked to one of Mr. Shue’s kids she would shave my head. And I just can’t rock that look. Even Justin Timberlake is growing his ‘fro back.

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SUE: (to Puck and the dutch cheerleader, after they realize Mr. Shue ‘just doesn’t like minorities’): Can you imagine, in this day and age, being discriminated against? My goodness, the pain you must be feeling. So your last name is Puckerman, eh?

PUCK: Shalom! (raises fist)

SUE: Who knew? And poor, sweet Brittany! Oh, I know the Dutch are famous for being a cold people, but that’s no excuse for treating you like some half-price hooker in Amsterdam’s famous red-light district! Well, all I can say is if you’re serious about leaving Will Shuster, Sue Sylvester’s rainbow tent will gladly protect you from his storm of racism.

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SUE: Look, I’m prepared to cut you a deal. You pass my Cheerios, and I’ll give you back your team of losers and snot faucets.

WILL: Sue Sylvester, you’re going to have to pry those “F”s from my cold, dead hands!

SUE: Can’t wait, pal!

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KENDRA: Well, Wu, you delivered all three of my kids. Each one is dumber than the last. Plus they all have ADD. And, although neither my husband nor I have red hair, they are all creepy ginger kids.

DR. WU: It’s caused by a recessive gene.

KENDRA: That’s one theory. Do you want to hear mine? You gave me too much Pitocin when I was in labor, and it screwed up their DNA!

DR. WU: That’s not a theory. You just made that up. Mrs. Shue, is your sister on some type of new psychometric medication.

MRS SHUE: Not that I know of.

KENDRA: That’s offensive! Here’s the deal, Wu. My husband does the taxes for some very powerful mid-sized law firms in this town. And I’m sure somebody would be more than happy to take on my lawsuit.

WU: You’ll never win.

KENDRA: I don’t have to win. There’s only two OBs in this town. You get even the slightest stink on you, and you can bet that a bunch of your patients will close on up their legs and walk on over to Dr. Chin!

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QUINN (to Rachel): Listen here, treasure trail! We’re about to have a smackdown….Don’t play stupid with me, stubbles!

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SUE: You know, it’s sad enough that my ‘Sue’s kids’ are living in squalor, and probably on food stamps!

STUDENT: My dad’s a dentist!

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WILL: Hey Sue.

SUE: William, close the door.

WILL: I wanted to talk to you about what happened in the auditorium.

SUE: Good. I would have come to you too, but I have no idea where your office is.

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SUE: I’ve decided to step down as co-head of Glee…Yes, it’s not for me. Too fruity. I can’t stand the sight of kids getting emotional, unless it’s from physical exhaustion….I’d still like to stay on as consigliere…I was a veejay for a couple of years…I know I’m not like the rest of you hippies, caring about the kids’ feelings as if they were real. But I do care about teaching.

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WILL: Who’s to say everything I do is 100% on the ball?

SUE: No one would say that.

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WILL: You’re all minorities.. .So it doesn’t matter that Rachel is Jewish or that Quinn..

QUINN: Can’t tell my right from my left!

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SUE (to Jacob, holding up Rachel's panties with a pencil): This was a particularly interesting find from today’s round of locker checks. Are these your droopy white granny panties, Jacob? Are you an ‘Eve’ who was born a ‘Steve’? Because if you are, I think there is a school that would better address your needs. And I think that school is in Thailand.

[MarkH]

I gather the show is growing. Slight bumps in the 18-39 demo (per Roger Newcomb). He also links a WSJ blog that lists many of the "Sue-isms" that I do above.

I think this may be the breakout show of the year...not necessarily in ratings, but in buzz!

[Toups]

Loved "Keep Holding On", "No Air", and "Ride With me."

It's going to be even bigger once it airs after American Idol.

Jane Lynch has got to get an Emmy nomination! Sue Sylvester is so awesome.

And Mark, I see you already beat me with some of the quotes. LOL Is there a site where you got the quotes because I type them and I rather not have to if there's already a site.

Episode 1.7: "Throwdown"

Sue: I am going to create an environment that is so toxic, no one will want to be a part of that club. Like the time I sold my house to a nice young couple and I salted the earth in the backyard so that nothing living could grow there for a hundred years. You know why I did that? Because they tried to get me to pay their closing cost.

Jacob: The independent polling company in my dockers has determined you’re the hottest girl in this school.

Sue: Alright everybody, listen up. When you hear your name called, cross over to my side of this black shiny thing.

Will: It’s called a piano, Sue.

Sue: Santana, Wheels, Gay kid…..come on, move it! Asian, other Asian, Aretha, and Shaft. See Will, I don’t want to participate in a group that ignores the needs of minority students.

Sue: Sometimes people ask me, “Sue, how come you’re so sensitive to minorities?” Well, I’ll tell you why, because I know first hand how hard it is to struggle as a minority in America today – I’m 1/16 Kamanchee Indian. In fact, I like minorities so much, I’m thinking of moving to California to be one.

Sue: Let me break this down for you, okay. I empower my ‘Cheerios’ to be champions. Do they go onto college? I don’t know. I don’t care. Should they learn Spanish? Sure, if they want to become dishwashers and gardeners, but if they want to become bankers and lawyers, and captains of industry, the most important lesson they could possibly learn is how to do a round-off.

Sue: This was a particularly interesting find from today’s round of locker checks. Are these your droopy whitey granny panties, Jacob? Are you an Eve who was born a Steve? Because if you are, I think there’s a special school that would better address your needs and I think that school’s in Thailand.

[MarkH]

I think Wall Stree Journal (yup) is recording "Sue-isms"...but my quotes this week were typed with my loving hands. I just loved the ep so much.

[MarkH]

A moment of soapy perfection on Glee.

Puck sings "Sweet Caroline" (which is fun, as we discover the voices of these people). And in wordless reactions, we see that Quinn loves Puck, Finn notices Puck going for Rachel and is jealous, Rachel is blithely ignorant.... Suddenly we have a workable quad...and it was done without a word of dialogue.

I love this show.

[Bright Eyes]

That's one of the few parts I enjoyed about this episode. Most of the rest was boring.

[Sylph]

[MarkH]

Not the best episode of the season, but such a bright spot on the schedule for me. Even the weaker/less funny shows (or shows with music I care less about) are better (for my mood, anyway) than just about anything else on US primetime. (Except for the ABC Wednesday comedy lineup, which are the first sitcoms I have watched in a decade!)

I'm stuck in some kind of warp, listening to Puck do "Sweet Caroline" on endless loop, lol.

[Chris B]

This is a show I enjoy, but I was hesitant about watching it due to the token minority characters. This is the type of modern show that loves to tout diversity, but it's so transparent. You have the white lead characters like Quinn, Rachel, Finn, Puck and the adults and the minorities are all on the sidelines supporting them. The minority characters will be given "very special" episode treatment, like Kurt with his two episode coming out. The mainstream teens will have the storylines at the forefront for the entire season. The real romances and issues that are developed. For that reason I can't say I love this show. It's very good and bringing something different to TV, but it has it's big shortcomings just like all of current TV.

[MarkH]

Yes, I have thought about this too.

Last week, they tried to make the claim that "we're all minorities"...but the fact remains that Puck-Quinn-Finn-Rachel are front-burner, and among the teachers, Shuster and Sylvester are front burner...and each one of 'em is white.

One of my disappointments about this show is that it is less of an integrated ensemble piece...so that "Wheels and Aretha and Shaft, etc." all get equal emphasis.

For now, though, the show is one that I can just lose myself in...goofy/funny, soapy, interestingly done tunes. I find it is one of the few hours a week where I can shut off my cognitive/analytical brain and just have fun. I sort of hope that after they get done with the current front-burner "launch" story (the quad and Shuster) that we'll see others have a turn at front burner for extended runs. I also realize that is unlikely to happen, but I'm hopeful.

[Toups]

Well, Rachel and Puck are Jewish, so they're not exactly "white". And Ken's on a lot too who's Native American.

Episode 1.8: "Mash-Up"

Puck: When I woke up I knew it was more than a dream. It was a message from God. Rachel was a hot Jew and the good Lord wanted me to get into her pants.

Sue: I hear people say, “That’s not how I define marriage.” Well to them I say, “Love knows no bounds.” Why can’t people marry dogs. I’m certainly not advocating intimacy with your pets. I for one think intimacy has no place in a marriage – walk in on my parents once, it was like seeing two walruses wrestling. So “wolf” on Prop-15, Ohio. And that’s how Sue sees it.

Rod: I need a gal with a back-bone and I think you might just be that gal.

Sue: Don’t you have a wife, Rod.

Rod: She drowned. So now I’ve got the condo all to myself.

Will: Your commitment to football is about as long as your pants.

Kurt: Someone get me to a day spa, STAT! (They bring him to the girls washroom)

Sue: I’ll need to see that set list for the sectionals after all. And I want it on my desk, warm from the laminator at 5pm. And if it is one minute late, I will go to the animal shelter and you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat, and then on some dark cold night I will steal away into your home and punch you in the face.

[MarkH]

I think Puck and Rachel are white, just not WASP, LOL.

I think Puck got a whole new fanbase this week.

[BadZoe]

Double - post

Edited October 27, 2009 by BadZoe

[BadZoe]

I liked Puck and Rachel because Finn is too dumb to live, he thinks he knocked up his girlfriend in a hot tub without physical contact.

One of my favorite moments and hopefully not the end to Ruck:

Rachel: "I just hope we can still be friends"

Puck: "We weren't friends before". And walks away.

Not my favorite episode but that was mainly due to the wedding storyline which I do not like at all.

[Toups]

THR article: TV and music execs talk 'Glee'