Confessing the Truth: Your Worst Prank

[Ryan]

I have created this thread in honor of the great Kenny a.k.a. "Mr. Bitch". I don't have time to explain some of my pranks just yet, but I'm sure everyone else would love to read what some of you have done.

[Drew]

I wouldn't exactly call it a prank. But I arranged it for this guy to walk in on his girlfriend and her ex who were making out in the walk in freezer at my old job.

I saw her and the ex giving odd looks all day. Then she asked me if I was done with the bake for a while basically, like "are you caught up for a while?" kind of thing. I caught on, and basically told her I was good for another hour or so. Then I saw her and her ex who also worked counter sneaking into my walk in freezer. So I asked her boyfriend if he could get wipped topping from the freezer, basically anything just to get him in there ... and [!@#$%^&*] flew.

That !@#$%^&*] tried to get me written up for something I didn't do. So I destroyed her personal life, got her fired, and revealed her to be the little whore a select few of us knew her to be to all her little friends. Half her friends we so mad she did it to the bf they won't talk to her anymore. All in one move. It was great.

[KLN]

LMAO Drew! I love it.

We're such evil !@#$%^&*]es here.

[Mitchapalooza]

Thats AWESOME!!

[Drew]

I'm a very nice person goddamnit! I'll do almost anything for anyone. But don't [!@#$%^&*] with me! People mistake me for a pushover, but I am a scary and vindictive little !@#$%^&*] when crossed. And I'm very patient ...

and Mr. Cremesicle also got the sack. I hope him and that 15 year old little whore have many babies before their teens are over.

[NaVell J. Lee]

WoW, Drew! I love it! Makes what I have to say sound so tedious. LOL

Well, in H.S., I was know as the son of a bitch. HAHA. I had went to my friend's graduation party, and my best friend's girlfriend, at the time, was drinking and whatnot, and he didn't want her to. She made me promise not to tell anyone that she was drinking the booze, but this little boy couldn't keep his mouth shut. Snitch, you ask? Well, sorta b/c she hated how I was best friend's w/ her bf at the time.....and the fact she was an evil little bitch.

Not soon after I told him that she was drinking heavily, more stuff hit the fan when he found out her and her ex-boyfriend started making out in the car, and she was messing w/ ANOTHER guy. I just got the ball rolling. And she kept asking me if I was the one who told him everything, and of course, I said no. So, I did cause their break-up....well, after I found out she cheated on him again, and I told him about that. And, I got to watch it as it happened...the break-up, I mean. LOL

HAHA, I made some enemies back then. LOL

[bellcurve]

Hmmmm....my worst prank was just recently over the summer!

Make a long story short to set you up for the big prank, this guy(Call him Link) I knew from a class of mine kind of lead me on because he knew I had a crush on him, including using such vague things like, "Well, now that class is over, we can start dating." Being the idiot I am, I bought this hook, line and sinker. After eventually asking Link what he meant, he said, "I'm not gay, but I think your cool and we can be good friends." And after two times calling, he never called back. I got really shitfaced and left him a text telling him he was a piece of [!@#$%^&*] and that he looked and acted like Mary Alice's son on DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES. This was at the beginning of the summer.

So, fast-forward to the middle of summer and I meet a girl(call her Donna, who BTW, bears a striking resemblance to Erin Hershey-Presley) who kind of/sort of knows this guy because they did plays together when they were like 12. But she hasn't seen him since then. I told Donna about how he led me on, flirted with me and how I was sick of guys pulling their bullshit. And one night when we were drunk, Donna said she wished there was a way we could get back at him. I told her we could always devise some sort of scheme where we could(via Facebook) make him fall madly in love with her and then on their 'first date,' have revealed that it was all a setup. She loved the idea and so did I.

For the next two weeks, there were messages back and forth traded between Link and Donna on Facebook. She plays it coy, not wanting him to exactly get the wrong idea, just a "Let's get to know each other" kind of thing, but of course, word it in a way where getting to know each other is very vague. And he buys it!

So, the big reveal went down at a local coffeeshop, where I was staked out at a table and a menu covering my face. Link met Donna at a table across the room from mine. She gave me the signal(grabbing the bottom of her chair), and then I went over there, acted like like I was just running into them and she says, "So, do you know my friend Bellcurve?"

And after the two screwdrivers I drank at the table, I was ready and totally queening it up. The plan was to make Link eventually figure out that it was all a setup. But him getting there was quite a journey.

I noticed Link(who had longer, bushy, curly hair when I met him) cut off his locks and took notice, saying, "Oh my goodness. Something is completely different about you. Your long, curly, Jesus-like hair: it's GONE! And let me be the first to say short hair does not become you my friend!"

And, in our town, a local club does 'Alternative Night' featuring drag shows and such and Donna mentioned something to Link about it and he said he would have a problem getting in because he's a guy under 21.

I said, "They let people 18 and up get in on Sunday Nights, but it's the alternative night, you know, the GAY night. And we wouldn't want any short little fags running around hitting on you, now would we?"

Still thinking this was a chance meeting, I kept on saying, "I am such a cold, callous !@#$%^&*] right now" hoping he would get the hint. But he didn't.

And the drama continued when he ordered a coffee drink and had whipped cream on his lip, to which I said, "You have a little bit of white stuff, like whipped cream on your lip...I'M the only one that's supposed to have that remember?!" LOL.

So, finally, after my friend and I really don't think that he gets it, I apologize to her for bringing her into this mess. And then I tell the guy, "I'm sorry for doing this. But you know?! It's HARD for people like me..."

He said, "I didn't make anything hard for you."

I said, "Oh yes you did. You leading me on, telling me that we could be friends..."

And he said, "You know what? You're not being a !@#$%^&*] right now, you're being a total bastard. You come here, drunk, making a scene and you just need to leave right now."

And I said, "Well, I'm not leaving without my friend."

And then, after she offers to pay for her own drink, it finally clicks that it was all a setup. But after a few more messages aplogizing and telling him that I needed closure, all was well that ended well. LOL! I guess until he decides to get revenge against me.

Another interesting, coincidental note about the coffeeshop: there are lots of paintings on the wall by local artists and the painting we were sitting under was called Cosmic Drama. The painting behind the guy was called, "The Eye of God."

Who ever said revenge wasn't sweet!?

ETA: A lot of other funny stuff happened at this table too, but that was the short version of the LONG tale! LOL.

I know what you mean: I try to be a nice person and I kinda feel the same way. I go by the rule don't [!@#$%^&*] with me or my emotions or you will pay!

Sometimes, I can't wait for karma to do its just desserts.

[KBT]

This isnt really a prank(b/c it wasnt planned) but its a secret I kept for 2 1/2 years and it was such a good scheme, although evil considering I did it to my own brother.

Anyway me and my brother are less than a year apart so we used to wear each others clothes a lot growing up. We also shared a room together growing up, and one day I was getting dressed and while I put on a pair of shorts(thinking they were mine but were actually my brothers) I felt something in the pockets. So I reached in the pocket and out comes my brothers wallet with 320 dollars cash in it. Of course I had to see how much he had in there. Well right then I decided to steal the money and hide his wallet because I didnt have time to throw it away just yet. This happened when I was 17 or 18, the time when I used to steal left and right just no one knew besides me that I stole stuff all the time. I intially quit stealing when I got caught at JCPenny's(where I was working at the time) when I was 19 and luckily wasnt charged but had to pay back 550 dollars within 6 months unless I wanted to get arrested. Back to the story.......

After I took my bro's money I went into scheme mode. I had to take off his shorts and put on a pair of mine plus I had to hide the wallet as soon as possible because my brother was still inside the house and could enter the room at anytime. I hid it real quick inside the backgammon case that was in our closet. I knew no one ever played it and luckily no one ever played it. Although one time,and its almost like a soap opera,my brother was going to play backgammon with his girlfriend when I instinctively remembered if he opens that he will know everything! I cant believe I left it up there in that closet for so long, but right after that I went and threw his wallet in the trash at the local gas station.

Not long after I took my brothers money and hid that as well there was a lot of drama in the house. A bunch of my brothers friends came over and was waiting on my brother to get ready and go out for the night. As I walked outside and into the back yard my brother was yelling and going off saying where in the hell did I misplace the money I just cashed at the bank? 2 of his friends went back with him to the bank and to the gas station the only 2 places my brother remembers being at. And the other 2 stayed behind lookign in the yard in case my brother dropped it in the grass somewhere. Of course I knew they werent going to find it, but i went and helped them look int he yard and acting all cooperative in the matter. When my bro returned he was so upset and I started to feel bad, but I wanted to keep the money so I had ot say to myself too damn bad and just continued to play along. My mom and dad asked all of us did anyone take the money by accident and everyone said no and that was pretty much the end of it after a few more hours of searching for his wallet. My brothers night was ruined and was out 320, but I was 320 dollars richer and had to spend it without them knowing because my brother knew I didnt have 320 to spend either.

I honestly do not even remember what I bought with the money, all I know is that I did spend it ALL.

Fast foward to our family FL trip about 2 1/2 years later after the incident and I couldnt take it anymore. I said Kyle(my brothers name) I have something to tell you. I was tearing up and finally starting crying and said I am very sorry but I have to just say it.....Do you remember that 320 doallrs you lost a few years back, well I was the one who took it. My whole family was int he hotel room listening to me, including my brothers g/f who came along with us. First the room went silent and my mom walked over to me and slapped the [!@#$%^&*] outta me, you WHAT? How dare you Kirk and balh blah blah.....my brother actually laughed and said I knew it was you but I could tell he was hurt....my dad smirked and laughed and my sister just shook her head in disbelief....while i was crying though I promised to pay him back every penny when we got back home because i had some money saved up......he was actually not that mad at me which surprised me a lot. He was just glad he was getting an extra 320 dollars back the followign week. To this day its one of the biggest schemes I have pulled off, but now I wont even think to steal from my own family, no matter what. After stealing a lot when I was a few years younger I dont even want to anymore.

I am actually one of the nicer people you will meet and like Drew if you [!@#$%^&*] with me you will have hell to pay. I am not someone you [!@#$%^&*] around with and I also have patience and a GREAT memory, so I will eventually get you back twice as good.

[Soapsuds]

Glad your Mom slapped you Kirk. You sure deserved it!

[dimples]

Boy, for that prank alone Drew, I HAD to register . I wish I could punk people like that.

[Drew]

the key is patience. And being observant. I watch people, I'm a good reader of people and have a good intuition. And I listen. I don't talk [!@#$%^&*] about people but I will always listen to it, it's good to keep yourself informed especially incase it concerns you. That way you can read situations and know exactly whats going on.

Everything from then on it just a matter of good timing, and taking advantage of a situation while being able to maintain a plausable denyability.

I didn't really know what was going on in there. I betrayed no confidance. I just asked a subordinant to get something for me. And after all the dust settled I could legitimatly say "oops" with no harm to myself.